I agree with MyBoyPuck. Don't worry about where you sit against the others. The great thing about this sport is it's just you and your horse. You work and compete at the level you are at. You don' have to meet anyone's standards but your own (well your coaches too, ha ha). It sounds like you're getting good instruction now.
Without seeing you ride, I'd say because of the confidence issues, that your not quite and Intermediate rider. When I've advertised a horse for an intermediate rider, my thoughts are this is a rider who can handle a horse who isn't totally made, may need some guidance, throws in some surprises here and there, but doesn't need to constant attention of an advanced rider. At this point it sounds like you're a great partner, but not the leader yet.
Keep it up though... from what you've posted in the last year you've advanced rather well.
If your horse says no, you either asked the wrong question or asked the question wrong
And God took a handful of southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse