I don't understand why would you get a horse that you were afraid of? I can understand wanting to learn a different style of riding, but why chose to do it on a horse that you don't have experience riding? Going from a slower, steady western horse to an OTTB is a big difference.
I WAS scared of her, she doesn't scare me anymore. She's actually a really really great horse who is extremely responsive and actually listens better then the lesson horses. The only reason I was scared of her was because she was very stressed out when I got her and as soon as she got off the trailer all she did was run circles around me. Also Blue(my old guy) isn't a "slower steady western horse" in fact, Bella is easier to ride then him, Blue is an arab/quarter who's personality is ALL arab. He would take off on me all the time and I just got used to galloping and then it became fun, it wasn't fun the first few times he did it, but I was young and speed was less scary then. The only thing is Blue is only 14.2hh and Bella is 16hh. Bella is much MUCH easier to ride. I'd actually think i'd me more scared to take Blue out on the trail today then Bella(although Blue is retired as he's in his mid 30's).
It really doesn't matter which horse I am on, I'm scared of the canter, not of the horse. Yesterday when I was going to canter I kinda screwed myself because I wanted to, but I didn't. What I mean is, while I planned to do it, I didn't prepare to ask for it, so I didn't shorten my reins in preparation to ask I kinda just spur of the moment asked before I could change my mind again, stupid I know,but I had to kinda trick myself into doing it other wise I will keep over thinking it and not do it. Which is what is hard with the lesson horses, I'll ask for a canter, but they can scene that I'm not really "asking" and that I don't mean it, so they don't do it. With Bella, I ask and she does. Last week I was practicing my 2 point around the arena at a trot and she dropped her shoulder and I lost my balance just a bit and when I did that I touched her with my outside leg and she just about cantered, but I stopped her before she could. I should have that day because we were having a REALLY good day lol.
Also about her fast trot, I was just comparing it to the lesson horses trot, Bella is a big mover and really pushes you up with each stride, and her natural pace is faster then Molly's. I can trot her easily now, it just took some getting used to, I can also easily slow her down, as soon as I slow my posting she slows to match me. She really is an amazing horse and we do have a great bond, I just have this stupid mental block when it comes to cantering, when I do ask I stiffen up and then everything falls apart. I joked the other day with my riding instructor that I need to take a muscle relaxer before I'm going to canter
lol...I'm thinking I might be able to go out there tonight again and ride, just depends on what time I get out of work. Maybe someone will be there that I can ask to video it for me(Val, my riding instructor, is terrible with a camera, I asked her once and most of the video was of the ground or ceiling). Thanks for listening to my rant, I have to get back to work now, those 50 dogs aren't going to walk themselves lol