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concered for the horse and rider!

This is a discussion on concered for the horse and rider! within the English Riding forums, part of the Riding Horses category

     
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        12-10-2008, 08:07 AM
      #11
    Yearling
    I agree with Connemara, you need to take charge. If she refuses to listen to you she should be dropped from the program. No 8 year old should be grooming and tacking without second by second supervision. (unless they are one of those rare horse kids who started when they were 5 and actually know what they are doing) At our barn I supervise everyone until I am completely convinced they know what they are doing and even then I double check to make sure feet are properly picked up, bridle and saddle properly adjusted, etc. And those are for adults and kids a like of all ages.

    Sounds like this program does not provide enough structure or supervision.
         
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        12-10-2008, 08:56 AM
      #12
    Yearling
    I'm thinking that an eight year old kid isn't physically capable of doing these things properly without a lot of supervision! Who on earth is letting an eight year old do anything involving a horse without a responsible adult being present and managing each activity?
         
        12-10-2008, 09:02 AM
      #13
    Yearling
    Ponypal, you sound like you are trying to do the best you can with a bad situation. I would ask for more supervision or let your mom know you can't mentor this child anymore as she does not listen.
         
        12-10-2008, 11:54 AM
      #14
    Weanling
    I agree with everyone: The girl has to listen to you or she can't ride! For one, it is dangerous for the horse (and herself!) and secondly, I think we all know what that will turn into if not corrected... If she doesn't listen to you or the BO you guys will have to talk to her parents and let them know she can't act that way. If that still doesn't do anything (usually kids that don't listen to other adults learn those behaviors at home) you will have to drop her from the program. It's your guys' liability, so you should make sure everything is safe. You don't want to rack up the vet bill if the horse gets hurt and God forbid if she gets hurt... Sue-happiness is very prevalent here, so make sure you stand your ground and teach her respect towards other people and horses!
    Good luck! I know it's tough, but hang in there! It's for the greater good.
         
        12-10-2008, 02:24 PM
      #15
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by claireauriga    
    I'm thinking that an eight year old kid isn't physically capable of doing these things properly without a lot of supervision! Who on earth is letting an eight year old do anything involving a horse without a responsible adult being present and managing each activity?

    I hate to tell you this but for those of us who come from horse families have been expected to treat our horses with respect and care for them properly from a very young age. When I was eight I knew better than to do any of what this girl is doing. If my parents, mentors or instructors caught me doing any of those things, I would have gotten it handed to me. It's not like I was some exceptional eight year old either. I know of two families that are very big where I'm from and their kids have been rodeoing since they could walk. Yeah, this girl may not come from a horse family but that age is no excuse for disrespecting her mentors and her horses.
         
        12-10-2008, 03:18 PM
      #16
    Foal
    Hate to say it, but when I started riding I was exactly like that little girl, I thought I knew everything, when I obvisously didn't. Then I put a pony in danger and I finally understood what I was doing wrong when some one got in my face, my trainer. She gotten within 3 inches of my face, she wsa stern and firm, I haave never been rude there a gain, yes I was young and stupid, now I never let a chance to learn something pass me by. So maybe that's what she needs
         
        12-10-2008, 03:19 PM
      #17
    Foal
    Exclamation

    I talked to her mother today, and she said that she has been through a lot, she said "oh she is just a little mean on the outside and sweet on the inside. She will get over it" I really don't think you can get over it, you have to learn. I had to do all of the work today, though that's not such a big deal, I LOVE DOING THE HARD WORK!! But eventually she will need to ;earn or she will not be able the ride. God thing is that today, the barn manager, found out what she was doing and she is not allowed to ride for the next two days!! I know that's not nice but she needs to learn, if not the easy way but the hard way. So I showed her how to cool the horses down the right way and she looked like she was listening,

    I don't want to say that she isnt intrested but, some 8 year olds are great with horses and are really responsible. This girl, well just might be going through a stage that she just really loves horses. Who knows. I really don't think the mother really understands her. NOW I REALLY don't MEAN FOR THAT TO SOUND BAD OR ANYTHING I reakky sounds bad. I am trying to be strict and sweet at the same time cause I don't want to turn her off horses for ever if she really likes them. But I have mentored for three years now and I have never had this much trouble!!(sigh) makes me tired just thinking about it.
         
        12-10-2008, 03:32 PM
      #18
    Weanling
    If she's into horses she won't be turned off by someone showing her how to do it. Either way, she is supposed to listen to you if you are her mentor! That is just basic respect. That is what I meant about learning it at home. It will create future problems if she is not taught respect. Plus, you really want to avoid the horse and her getting in danger so act! Better be a little harsh with her than have someone need medical assistance (vet or human).

    You can be nice, but if you have to be stern and clear. I think your BO did the right thing. She needs to learn respect and how to do things properly. She will not have someone there to do everything for her horse forever. Don't feel bad about being stern! I know it's hard nowadays, but sometimes sweettalking doesn't do anything. Sometimes you have to say No! And mean it. Otherwise that girl will never learn to listen and respect others. And it is better for her to learn it now, where you just have to remind her and explain, than if she is older and will face a tougher situation. Being stern doensn't equal being mean. Being stern when the need arises is called parenting. Be as sweet as you can, but as stern as you have to.
         
        12-10-2008, 03:49 PM
      #19
    Weanling
    Kiara- You are right she would be very interested in how to do everything the right way if she is really into horses. I know I was when I first started!

    She might just not be ready to be taking care of a horse. I don't want that to sound mean in any way, but some kids just arent mature enough to take proper care of a horse.
    This doesnt mean that she shouldnt be able to be around the horses because if she is really going through a hard time like her mom said then she does need to be around the horses because horses are very good therapy. I know whenever I am down my horses always cheer me up.

    I agree with everybody else who said that she just needs to maybe start from just grooming the horse and maybe since you are the mentor maybe pick a few days out of the week to be with her and help her tack up the horse and then watch her ride and make sure she is doing everything correctly. I don really know what your job is by being her mentor but I think this would help a little.
         
        12-10-2008, 04:51 PM
      #20
    Foal
    Thumbs up

    Well that helps, I don't want to be mean but I think that its a good idea for her to sit out for a while. And yes horses are great tharapy, but this girl when she is in a bad mood, SHE IS FURIOUSE. I have seen her many times try to injure the horse (though you really can't like punch a horse and it severly injure them!!) and I have been concered for a while about that. I and really just worried about her. If she keeps acting like this then she will get hurt.
         

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