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Craziest analogies your instructor has made

This is a discussion on Craziest analogies your instructor has made within the English Riding forums, part of the Riding Horses category

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        08-06-2013, 03:04 AM
    Originally Posted by countercanter    
    "You paid to use all the corners in this ring, you better ride down into them."

    In regards to keeping your hands/thumbs up - "Pretend like you are holding a bird in each hand...if you don't close your fingers, they will fly away and if you ride with flat hands you are going to smash their heads together."

    "Bring the girls to the party and stretch up."

    I LOVE that one!
    Chokolate and konikirule like this.
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        08-06-2013, 03:45 AM
    When I was little, I was told to imagine that I was holding two ice cream cones while riding to encourage me not to ride with "piano hands".

    I have also been told to imagine that I am balancing a book on my head while riding.

    One analogy that I liked was to imagine that two anchors were attached to my heels and they were dragging along behind while I rode. This was meant to encourage me to allow the weight of my leg to sink into my heels without trying to forcibly pin my legs down.

    Finally I've been told to imagine that there is a rotten egg in the seat of my saddle and if I land too hard in my saddle while posting, I'll get it all over my riding pants.
        08-20-2013, 07:39 PM
    When my instructor wanted me to relax at the sitting trot or at the canter, she would yell at me to "be a blob of JELLO". Another one of her favorite quotes (not an analogy though) is "sit where you pee, not where you poo". Yes I know its strange, but that's what you get from horse people
        08-20-2013, 08:28 PM
    My instructor told me to imagine my legs like a hallway and to guide my horse through the hallway..

    I also got "pretend your boobs are headlights, follow their directional turns.."
        08-20-2013, 08:35 PM
    "The horse is a Porsche, engine's in the back!"
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    Ninamebo likes this.
        08-22-2013, 05:15 PM
    "Hump the air."
    Self explainatory
    amp23 likes this.
        08-22-2013, 07:32 PM
    One of my lesson girls doesn't keep her elbows in so I tell her "your not a chicken, don't fly away on me!"

    "It's like flying an airplane, your the pilot not the passenger!"

    "Pretend he's a tube of tube paste and your sqeezing the paste out with your legs"

    One that helps one of my lesson girls a lot is, "Pretend there is a hot air balloon attached to your helmet and it's lifting you up!"
        08-22-2013, 09:38 PM
    I don't think this is an analogy, but my old instructor used to threaten to duct tape our fingers closed if we didn't keep them closed! (Never actually happened, but it was effective for us eight-year-olds :) )
    remka likes this.
        08-22-2013, 09:41 PM
    ^^ haha! If my shoulders weren't back, my instructor would threaten to tie my ponytail to my horses tail. Never actually happened either
    MyBoyFortune likes this.
        08-24-2013, 07:25 AM
    An old instructor of mine used to shout "tits and teeth!"
    Cracked me up everytime

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