Do you argue with your instructor? - Page 3 - The Horse Forum
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post #21 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 10:14 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by koomy56 View Post
I have total freedom, but only for the reason is because she is teaching me to be a better trainer and to think and feel independently. .
That's an interesting insight. Maybe I feel like she's talking down to me, and I feel like I'm more on equal ground at least in terms of this time it's on my own horse. I've always been a self starter. At most I was only working with my old trainer every 3 weeks or so. I tend to work on myself and my horse a lot and then use lessons as tuneups. It's ultimately not a big issue. I just found the situation so odd when I wasn't allowed to question anything that I thought maybe I'm the only person challenging the info.

You just have to see your don't have to like it.
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post #22 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 10:23 PM
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Is trailering out to another trainer a possibility? We have the same rule inforced at our barn and it sucks! I've never taken a lesson from our instructor/trainer but I've argued with her plenty! As far as questioning a trainer, Im a systematic person who likes to know the whys of everything so I am an instructors worst nightmare. I also pay alot of money for a 1 hour lesson and spend 30 minutes of it asking questions and needing help with explanations. My current instructor is very patient and very rarely needs asked to explain anything.
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post #23 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 10:34 PM Thread Starter
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It's actually only a 10 minute hack to my old trainer's barn. The issue is getting to shows, and I have to be careful about how I play it. My old trainer charges me waaaayy too much for trailering. I have made some inroads at the new barn for rides to shows, but if this current situation blows up at all, I might lose out on those options too. For all I know, it's a "don't show with us - don't go with us" barn too. I have to find all that out quietly before I make a move. Hopefully by next year I'll have my own trailer and won't have to worry about this stuff anymore.

You just have to see your don't have to like it.
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post #24 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 10:46 PM
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I always found that so weird that you can't bring your own trainer in. Talk about creating monopoly problems. We have had that twice at our barn and both of those trainers ended up leaving. How long has that trainer been there? If you like the barn there is the possibility of the trainer leaving :)
I question my trainers all the time. If I don't understand the point of it I can't process it in my brain as well to try and pull it off. Good trainers can explain the reason for doing anything. That is one way to know how experienced they are. Both of the trainers I have worked with start a lesson with "What would you like to work on today, are you having any specific problems?" You know your goals and your horse!
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post #25 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 11:14 PM
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Originally Posted by koomy56 View Post
I have total freedom, but only for the reason is because she is teaching me to be a better trainer and to think and feel independently. .
I wish more coaches would teach this way.

To teach a person to be just a rider limits their understanding of the workings of the horse and ultimately limits their options in the show ring.
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post #26 of 56 Old 05-16-2010, 11:20 PM
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Your new instructor sounds like she has a very shallow knowledge of her job. Maybe she has done what her trainers said without ever LEARNING the whys.

I say load you horse in your trailer and go to your old trainer. They can't stop you from doing that.
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post #27 of 56 Old 05-17-2010, 12:16 AM
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I don't have an instructor to be able to argue with haha.
I live in the wop wops with no horse float, and no trainer will come out to me.

R.I.P ~ Bubbles - 25yo tb mare - 13.04.2011 ~ 8:30am ~ passed away naturally and peacefully in my arms
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post #28 of 56 Old 05-17-2010, 12:50 AM
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Mine either says You are doing/or having problems with XXX, how do you think you should fix it? or You are having problems with XXX, I want you to try this to fix it and here's why.

So if I already know how (or think I know how) to fix the problem, I tell her and we try my way. If it flops, she then tells me her way to try and we do that. Or if I have no clue how to correct the problem, she'll give me something to try and explain why she thinks I should do that.
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post #29 of 56 Old 05-17-2010, 01:27 AM
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I have total freedom, but only for the reason is because she is teaching me to be a better trainer and to think and feel independently. .
This is what I do with the people I'm instructing. Granted, they're very much beginners - but I don't want to take their money, telling them the same thing over until they day I die. That's not TRUE teaching, IMO.

I like it when they ask questions, and question what I've told them. It shows that they're thinking about it, and it's more likely to stick with them. If they ask, and you tell them why, they SEE the purpose behind what they're doing. Even when I do lessons, I ask WHY all the time. If there's not reason behind it, then there's no reason to do it.

I've literally taken lessons where all I got from it was "Keep doing what you're doing, because it's working" .... I don't take lessons there anymore. I haven't taken lessons in a year, because I can't find an instructor who will better my riding or my horse. I can get the same out of a horse from everyone else around here, and it drives me NUTS because I so desperately want to gain more skills. Despite whatever, it's always good to ask WHY. As a paying client, you deserve reason.

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There they are all standing in a row

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post #30 of 56 Old 05-17-2010, 04:38 AM
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Yep I do, not a flat out argument, but I'll get into a discussion about WHY she wants me to do something. I don't just 'do' something I need to know why. And sometimes I don't agree with what she wants me to do. My trainer is also a very good family friend and often asks me for MY opinion on how her horse is travelling and if I can sit and watch her ride him and let her know if I can see anything that she needs to change. So she is quite happy for me to question her teaching. 99% of the time what she wants me to do works very well. But I do find that because she also teaches beginners and has school horses to pay the bills, sometimes she will revert to beginner rider mode and dumb things down a little too much. At those times I need to give her a quick flick on the backside with the whip as I ride past haha!

I think the competition between us and our different ideas helps both of us out as far as teaching and learning goes. I also LOVE proving her wrong haha, she lives to be right, and so proving her wrong feels so satisfying :P For instance when I got Hugo, the first week there he was travelling well, but wanted to stay up in an elementary frame when he wouldn't even be able to get through a prelim, being straight off the track. Coach said draw reins would get him travelling softer in a week rather than spending months sending him forward and into the bridle to get the same result. Well I went home, spent the week working in the paddock on him up and down hills and making him reach for the ground. Brought him back a week later and he travelled around with his nose on the ground stretching from the wither and over tracking.

You have to remember that yes, coaches are there to help you and obviously they've got more experience than you. But YOU are the only one that really knows your horse. and if something doesn't feel right, and you know you can get what the coach wants you to do but with a different method, speak up! On the other side, if you don't know how to get what the coach is asking for, listen to them and persist even if it feels like hell, because speaking from experience, it's often a case of riding through the rough patch and suddenly it will click and you'll be amazed at how your horse is travelling ;)
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