This is a long story but I hope you'll bear with me because I really need the help.
It all started back in November 2012. I was free leasing a throughbred (he was 8) and I was training him how to jump. This horse was terrified of jumping, and while I was having lessons once a week I was pretty much training him on my own. I wasn't at my instructors barn I was at my own barn and my instructor would come out once a week. Anyways, he was probably too much horse for me to handle at the time. After about 2 months of leasing him, he was coming along very well and starting to jump cross rails quietly. The day after thanksgiving 2012, I went to the barn to ride him, and I was intending on flatting him. However he went so unusually quiet that I decided to take him over a cross rail. Big mistake. He bolted at it, jumped it about 3', did 5 or 6 monster bucks, I fell off and he galloped around the ring for about 10 minutes before I could catch him. I ended up being fine thank goodness, and only ended up with bruised ribs. I ended up dropping the lease soon after.
Fast foward to April 2013.
I now own my own horse, which I was boarding at my trainers barn. She's a 12 year old appendix, she hadnt been ridden in 2 years before I got her so she was pretty green. I love this mare to death but she's pretty wild. The problem is, I get nervous that she's going to do something like the previous horse I had and I end up hanging on her mouth. She ends up getting nervous and then she gets faster and faster and crazier and crazier. I know she's not trying to hurt me, she just loves to jump, has a ton of natural talent and gets excited. The main problem we have is me holding on to her mouth. How do I stop being so nervous and afraid? I'm honestly not afraid of falling off, I'm more afraid of losing control like last time. I need help to get my confidence back and get out of her mouth! Any tips?
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