07-21-2013, 11:14 AM
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I still feel sick to my stomach when I think about the fact that I chose to drown it. I wish I would have found another way.
I know I have to leave the farm, and I'm absolutely sure that I am going to do so, but I've really gotten myself into a bad situation with them. I have both of my horses boarded there and the only way I can afford them both at the moment is by working off half of my board on my mare. I'm making plans to move both of them, buts complex considering that I don't have my own trailer, the owner of the farm is a control freak, and I only have a for-sure place for one of the horses right now. As soon as I have things figured out, I'll move them and be done with the place, though I'm afraid to do it. I'm tired of seeing animals suffer, and I'm tired of being pushed into involving myself with the suffering... Even if they are technically pest.
I don't think I'm going to tell the farm owner about being bitten though. She'll most likely tell me she told me to just leave it in the woods so its my fault (true) that I got bitten by the kitten. And it is my fault.
Sunny, to be honest I probably would have done the same thing if it hadn't been starting to rain (it started storming badly an hour later) and the kitten wasn't laying on top of broken ribs. I couldn't just leave it to be mauled by something else (we have bobcats, coyotes, wild dogs, possums, etc in our woods) or to die slowly. I know I hurt it SO much with the way I chose, and I wish I hadn't. Drowning it was simply because in the back of my mind I was afraid of seeing excessive blood. :/
Northern, whether or not a gun was available is probably irrelevant just because of my age. Ranch/farm owners actually ARE allowed to have a gun without a CHL but only if they live on the property, and no one lives on this particular property. I'm also under age, so I can not legally handle a gun at all unless I'm at a gun range or if I have tags for hunting. I don't hunt.