Well I do also have depression...not a terrible case but it runs very strongly in my family and it's pretty clear to me that it runs right this way, too. I outright refuse to go to a doctor and take meds, though, because to be honest I'm completely terrified of those things. You know what's helped me over the years, though? Working with horses, it's been a godsend. No matter how I feel, if I can go out and work with the horses I feel sane again. I've just got to find a way to get out of bed and out to the barn! I feel so blessed to have found something like this in life, without them I really honestly wouldn't be here.
I go through cycles of this and it's been a lot tougher since I've been horseless for awhile now, but I'm doing my best. We've all just gotta find a way to get by.
Sending out hugs, though. I hope you feel better soon