06-22-2012, 12:27 PM
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I have a similar problem. Before I met my hubby he worked in a high paying medical position with a hospital. The hospital termed his contract 9 months before we married this year. Since then, he has been doing freelance work and trying to start his own practice. Needless to say, his income has dropped over half. Thankfully, he lived modestly before he lost his hospital position so he doesn't have excess debt. Just the normal stuff, house, insurance, financial aid.
He is really struggling with the impact to his ability to make financial choices and the loss of his financial freedom. I work full time, but my income is not what I am used to either, since I am living in a rural town. I took a significant pay cut to perform the same job/duties as I did in the big city. I give him over 80% of my weekly income to help with household debt and expenses, leaving me with just enough money to do my hair once a month, put gas in my car, pay for Sam's board and save up for items I truly want.
I try very hard not to demonstrate any indication that our financial lifestyle is causing me frustration. I had also been pretty financially free - able to do a lot with little or no saving or planning.
I don't want him to feel worse about his "manly" position as the provider and his inability to take me to dinner "just because."
If you are the praying type, he has a job interview to provide medical instruction next week. It won't be the same money he had, but it is steady and pays more than my job so I know it will help. We would move, but he has children locally and it will kill him to leave them.