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Bullying and Cyberbullying

This is a discussion on Bullying and Cyberbullying within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

     
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        01-26-2010, 03:35 PM
      #11
    Showing
    I do take issue with those who try to squelch free speech on the Internet. It is a place where people speak their mind. I don't think that should ever change. Its one of the last uncontrolled voices we have. Even as a mod I have to decide what is free speech and what is unacceptable. I can't be a thread Nazi and edit helter skelter as I see fit. Its more of having to take the stance for the masses, not just based on my opinion.
    If a statement is made "grow some skin" well that is that persons opinion and they have the right to voice it. Its up to the individual whether to read it or not.
    I think it is the fault of the parent that allows their child free access to this media. If anyone needs censure, its them, not the adults who willingly partake in it.
    If your going to let your child onto the Internet then yes, they had better grow some thicker skin. In my opinion the answer is to not allow them free access in the first place.
         
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        01-26-2010, 03:46 PM
      #12
    Weanling
    ^ I agree. I was always pretty well monitored on the internet. I will say I have a decently thick skin (and head) too...lol. In school only a few people tried to bully me. I ignored them, they got mad, they yelled, adn then I laughed at them in front of everyone. It pretty much stopped the bullying. I have also never had an issue with stepping in if I see someone else bullied. I would have wanted someone to step in if it were me, a friend, or my younger sister. I have that whole want to right the wrongs attitude about it. It has gotten me in trouble before, but sometimes it helps that person find enough of a backbone to say back off. If not, it at least gives them some time to get away.
         
        01-26-2010, 03:53 PM
      #13
    Weanling
    IMHO cyberbulling is not bad...at all. I'm 14 (15 next week!) and being made fun of to your face is much MUCH worse. I get made of a lot and when someone sends you a mean e-mail you can delete it and be done. But when someone makes fun of you to your face them there are usually other people there that join in. And there is not much you can do when it's in the middle of class and the teacher actully joins in. If you are getting made fun of on Facebook just DON'T GET ON IT! You can't avoid going to school (trust me I've tried) but you can avoid getting on Facebook and opening up texts that you know are mean. Just my honest opinion...
         
        01-26-2010, 04:16 PM
      #14
    Banned
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by jiblethead    
    IMHO cyberbulling is not bad...at all. I'm 14 (15 next week!) and being made fun of to your face is much MUCH worse. I get made of a lot and when someone sends you a mean e-mail you can delete it and be done. But when someone makes fun of you to your face them there are usually other people there that join in. And there is not much you can do when it's in the middle of class and the teacher actully joins in. If you are getting made fun of on Facebook just DON'T GET ON IT! You can't avoid going to school (trust me I've tried) but you can avoid getting on Facebook and opening up texts that you know are mean. Just my honest opinion...
    Live a little longer and you may feel the full brunt of true cyberbullying, stalking and harassment.

    One individual was subjected to seeing a picture of a tombstone with their name on it. A real threat,.. probably not if the distance is great but the implication is there. The legal department that monitored that site felt it was a threat.

    With face to face confrontation at least you see your harassers but on the net, it could be your best friend in real live that has a grudge. Just get a username and stalk your victim (or your best friend). So easily done and IS done.


    Lets hope you never are in a situation like that. There was even one case where in a chat room one person was so harassed that he did what was being pushed on him over and over and committed suicide.

    As one person said grow a thicker skin but not everyone CAN ignore the taunts and in some cases the best defence against some harassers is to aggressivly fight back (wiuthout doing what the bullies are doing though).
         
        01-26-2010, 04:25 PM
      #15
    Super Moderator
    I moved from a bigger city to a smaller town around 4-6th grade and got bullied. Not very badly in a straight way but more like clearly ostracized. I think I carry some scared wounds from it also nowdays, even of course I've grown a lot during all these years and got the most of my confidence towards people back. About cyberbullying, it's something I've luckily never experienced.

    If my memory serves me, the Jokela school shooter (the school shooting which happened here back in 2008 ) was heavily bullied. Then he started to seclude himself mentally from other, normal people and create his genocide plans and ended up a massacre.

    I think it's a lot because of immaturity. Children and many teens can't step in someone else's shoes and like most of adults can do (even seems that some adults will never reach that empathy stage either) and many things seem to be pretty black-and-white before these youngsters start to find more tones when growing up. Besides that it's easy to find some outer target in which to project all these negative feelings when you're feeling unsure yourself and about it who YOU are. Some of these teen harassers will be all wise adults when they once grow up. I'd say that happened with most of those teens who ostracized me too.

    My opinion is that school and parents should be interfere in things IMMEDIATELY when somebody starts to bully someone. Also social workers and even police if the situation needs it. I think we would need more preventive work too. These children, teens (and some adults) need to understand that the victim of bullying is a human creature with all these feelings too.

    Crimsonhorse, some people are just more sensitive than others, especially during their youth times. Even I recommend that ignoring thing too as a first step since it has effects on some teasers, I can believe that when some person or people just bugs and bugs you, you finally just can't ignore it anymore.

    ETA: This thread had gained many news answers during I wrote mine so I could add: It's not words all the time. How you can ignore it when the teaser, after noticing that words will not hurt you, starts to threaten you physically or just does something else in practice. I've luckily never been there personally but sometimes felt it would have been turned like that soon and know some teasers go there.
         
        01-26-2010, 04:26 PM
      #16
    Showing
    Online harassment and bullying IS real, whether you want to turn a blind eye or not. Sure, you can say "don't let it get to you" or what have you, but it simply isn't that easy.
         
        01-26-2010, 04:36 PM
      #17
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Crimsonhorse01    
    Sorry to sound insensitive, but grow some thicker skin. Ignore it and move on.
    Okay so is that what your going to tell your child if they get bullied to "Grow some thicker skin and get over it?"

    I take bullying very personally in person and through internet. I never had a high self esteem in school. In result, I got picked on.
         
        01-26-2010, 05:02 PM
      #18
    Super Moderator
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Vidaloco    
    I think it is the fault of the parent that allows their child free access to this media. If anyone needs censure, its them, not the adults who willingly partake in it.
    That's an interesting point. My personal view (based on one other forum which has been divided senior talk and junior talk besiedes some other categories) is that sometimes adults should be more censored than children. I'm mainly for free speech too and think it can be hard to draw the line between it when someone says his or her opinion very straightly and it when it has turned insulting. Anyways, comments like "you have to be deranged" or "you're a totally jerk" on that forum came mainly from adult people, don't from children.

    So, perhaps in some cases, like father, like son...?
         
        01-26-2010, 05:53 PM
      #19
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by horses4life43    
    Okay so is that what your going to tell your child if they get bullied to "Grow some thicker skin and get over it?"

    I take bullying very personally in person and through internet. I never had a high self esteem in school. In result, I got picked on.
    That is most certainly what I will tell her. I will also tell her the reason why. If it gets to physical threats than it gets into parents stepping in. But, I will not be there all the time to protect her from what people will say. It happens in school it happens when your an adult. I to was made fun of in school but I really didnt give a S*(&.
         
        01-26-2010, 10:06 PM
      #20
    Weanling
    Wow to all of this!

    Crimsonhorse01- you really have no heart if your going to tell your own daughter that. Instead of telling her to get over it maybe you should talk to her about it. I feel bad for her when she comes home crying because she got picked on and you tell her to grow thicker skin!
         

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