Debate: Spanking children? - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 04:49 PM Thread Starter
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Debate: Spanking children?

I just watched a show where mothers were either for or against spanking as a punishment. What do you think?

I was spanked as a kid. I know how to compose myself and I know discipline. I would never talk back to my parents and I respect my elders. Nor do I look back and say, "I hate my parents for spanking me, that was abuse." Frankly, I think alot of kids these days should have been spanked. I hate seeing kids out in public throw a fit. I understand that toddlers and young kids will do that, and I don't care. But the worst is when I go to the mall and see a TEENAGE girl or boy on their nice cell phone screaming at their parents because they won't let them stay at their friends house or won't buy them something. My parents would beat me with anything that wasn't tied down and I was horrible at talking back but after a few washes with bar soap I learned my lesson.

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post #2 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:03 PM
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I'd never consider using soap (but that's mostly because I absolutely cannot deal with puking kids!).

My kids have been spanked but quite rarely. Both my girls got spanked for running into the street, they were tots who couldn't be reasoned with and it HAD to stop because we lived on a busy street and they would be run over. I reserved spankings for when I NEEDED to make a point that something would not under any circumstance be tolerated.

My kids are 9 and 6 and I can't recall the last time they got spanked. There are much more effective ways of punishing them now that they are old enough to understand losing privileges and having extra chores to do for misbehaving. Want to spend your time talking back to me? Oh goody.... enjoy washing dishes, scrubbing bathrooms and folding laundry!
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post #3 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:08 PM
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Before I was a mother, there were so many things I swore I would and wouldn't do! So much changes when you have a child. I swore I would never spank. But I had and do, when it is necessary.

Originally Posted by Delfina View Post
My kids are 9 and 6 and I can't recall the last time they got spanked. There are much more effective ways of punishing them now that they are old enough to understand losing privileges and having extra chores to do for misbehaving. Want to spend your time talking back to me? Oh goody.... enjoy washing dishes, scrubbing bathrooms and folding laundry!
That's my primary method as well. My son does get a swat from time to time, but it tends to be reserved for serious infractions. The best method I have found for his is taking away things he values - favorite toys, removal of TV privileges, tend to get results with him much more often.

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post #4 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:10 PM Thread Starter
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post #5 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:16 PM
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It's officially illegal here.

Anyways, I'm not sure what to think about that. On the one hand, what kind of message that gives to a child? You're allowed to hit other if they're weaker and don't obey the rules you give? Can a parent who threatens you physically be safe anymore? Does physical inviolability pertain to kids too?

On the other hand I think spanking can really make you respect your parents, without all that questioning and playing with limits and rules and it can also be a pretty straight way to teach what's wrong and what isn't. I don't either know if previous, spanked generations are more violent than the current "spankless" ones and if the child can just understand that spanking is just parents' way to set some limits, not a general way to treat other people.

Anyways I think I wouldn't go for that myself. I still don't accept spoiling and so-called uncontrolled parenting, children need rules and discipline. If you can't go physical way, then you have to find other effective ways to limit your children.

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post #6 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:22 PM
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Personally I agree with spanking. I had no problem with doing extra chores or getting grounded. My mother was an English teacher, so I also had to write essays. If I was mad I would still act up when I was little. I would never talk to my parents like so many other people my age do. If I did you can bet I would get slapped in the mouth, adn I would deserve it. I will say that I have never been the best at not talking back, but you couldn't have paid me enough to cuss at my parents or talk back in front of people EVER. There are plenty of times when I feel that a fast, strong discipline such as a spanking is much better than waiting until later to ground them or talk to them.
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post #7 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 05:29 PM
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I've never been spanked,grounded or slapped/hit , and I'd like to think that I turned out ok.
I have a good relationship with both my parents.

Last edited by ridingismylife2; 03-22-2010 at 05:37 PM.
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post #8 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 06:10 PM
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I got my fair share of spankings when I was younger (and deserved every one of them). I personally think that spanking is a good method of punishment... if done correctly. Done in a loving way to correct the child is good. Done in anger, and it could quickly turn bad.... Even though I hated getting spanked way back when, now I appreciate that Mom and Dad did it.
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post #9 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 06:16 PM
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I agree with spanking, like others said, if it's done the correct way. Cause I was spanked as a kid and beaten as a kid and I understood the difference. I don't hold it against my parents because I was spanked. I think it made me more respectful towards my elders. You would never have caught me mouthing off to my teachers or my mother (or she would and did knock me into next week.). But my daughter tells me daily of episodes where she tells a teacher no..or backtalks. :( I feel that it's disrespectful and wish I had maybe spanked more so that respect towards your elders had been instilled in her.

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post #10 of 38 Old 03-22-2010, 06:42 PM
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I grew up with spankings abound, even a teacher could grab you by the scruff and smack you about. Seems like things have been a lot worse since spankings became so unpopular. It needs to be brought back.

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