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Debate: Spanking children?

This is a discussion on Debate: Spanking children? within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

     
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        03-22-2010, 07:28 PM
      #11
    Showing
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by TaMMa89    
    It's officially illegal here.

    I only wish it was like that everywhere.
    I think it's a very personal decision.

    I think you can discipline children in a lot of other ways than spanking. I know my sister in law has never spanked any of her children(she has 5 under the age of 10), and they turned out as some of the best behaved kids I know.

    If you children are raised properly from the beginning, as much as they will always be rully(SP??) because children are children, there shouldn't much that they do that is severe enough to require spanking. I think there is always a different way to take care of situation gone wrong than spanking.
         
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        03-22-2010, 07:30 PM
      #12
    Green Broke
    I hope you aren't saying that people who believe in spanking don't know how to properly raise their kids.
         
        03-22-2010, 07:39 PM
      #13
    Green Broke
    I was never spanked, iive turned out fine, I love both my parents. As for the teenagers screaming at their parents for things like: you can't stay at a friends house tongiht' well, It only bugs me when parents don't have legite reasons, I have had my friends literally do NOTHING the whole weekend, but their parents wont let them go to a movie or something. My mom always lets me go to a movie or something, and she will adjust her schedule to drive me somewhere if I need it, which makes me feel bad, so I always make sure she's not doig anything or doesnt need to be somewhere, or isnt over-tired, but I've had friends that with get al pissed at their parents for no real reason, which makes me think " wow, im glad I never argue with my parents" haha but I think im like this because my brother was sorta a 'bad' kid and so im the good kid, haha. But I think spanking is find, wouldnt call it abuse
         
        03-22-2010, 07:45 PM
      #14
    Super Moderator
    I think certain situations call for certain actions.
         
        03-22-2010, 08:13 PM
      #15
    Green Broke
    I would think it is more mental. If they are scared of getting spanked they will mind. My aunt always got a leather strap off a saddle and snapped it making noise and scared us. We always believed that she would use it but never had to. You can mean business with out spanking but you can't threaten and not follow through.
         
        03-22-2010, 08:13 PM
      #16
    Yearling
    My step-dad and mom spanked me as a child. Not excessively and never with enough force to leave a mark but it got the point across fast as to what was acceptable and what was not.

    My dad and step-mom never had to. My step mom had this look that would kind of steal your soul if you ever did anything wrong.

    I'm ultra close with both sets of parents and I personally think I've turned out great.

    I plan on spanking my children should the time come but I wouldn't depend on that as the only form of discipline.
         
        03-22-2010, 08:14 PM
      #17
    Yearling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by churumbeque    
    you can't threaten and not follow through.
    Could someone make this a billboard? Because seriously I'm sick of hearing kids scream and squall because they want something and their parents threaten, and threaten and threaten until their blue in the face but by the child's reaction, they've never gone through with it do it doesn't even phase them.
         
        03-22-2010, 08:32 PM
      #18
    Showing
    I grew up in a household that was willing to spank when necessary. My Dad spanked me once for lying and once for not feeding my dog. My Mom slapped me in the face once for talking back. My Grandma even made me get my own switch from the tree in her front yard once, then proceeded to beat me with it. I hated it then but I appreciate it now. I look at some of the people that I grew up with that never had discipline of any kind and it makes me glad that I have the family I do.

    That being said, I don't think that spanking/not spanking is the only issue. It is just bad parenting in general that is creating the world we live in today. Parents who depend on tv and video games to babysit their kids. And small children watching shows like South Park and playing games like Zombie Massacre, Grand Theft Auto (where you get points for shooting cops), or whatever (I don't know much about video games but you guys get the idea). I'm not saying that the tv/v-games themselves are responsible but you combine a child growing up on things like that and a parent who is either not present or doesn't care enough to teach them that the things they see on tv are wrong, you end up with a teenager or adult that doesn't see anything wrong with theft. They look down the barrel of a gun and they just see a picture like the tv screen, they don't see a human. I worked in a prison for almost 6 years and I can tell you that the younger crop of criminals coming in are downright scary. They are willing to kill a person just for looking at them wrong and they feel absolutely no remorse for stealing or killing. Many of those that we got in where I worked came from the inner city of Houston, Austin, Dallas/Fort Worth, etc. They were surrounded by violence from every angle and their parents either didn't care enough to actually spend quality time with them or were working 4 jobs just to put food on the table. They were almost always alone and the family structure of a gang is very tempting. They offer money, security, and friendship and all you have to do is go rob this store or kill this rival. It is a vicious circle because society no longer allows anyone to actually punish a child for purposefully doing wrong. Even if the parents are not in the picture, the other adults simply turn their heads and ignore it instead of trying to make a difference. When I was growing up, the entire town had a standing order that if anyone saw me misbehaving, whoever was closest had the right to snatch me up and whip me.

    I bet if the first time a man touched a child inappropriately, if the kid's whole family showed up at his house and beat the holy living **** out of him, he would think twice about looking at a kid again. But no, lets send them to prison where they get whatever they want and the guards have to be nice to them, they get free medical care and free education so that they can be smarter about doing it again after they are released from their 5 year sentence. And that's the thing, they will do it again. The state of Texas recitivism rate is more than 85% (that means that 85% of the people that get out of prison will be back inside within a year).

    Most of us are part of a society that has become all too content with zero accountability: the offenders are not held accountable for their actions, the parents aren't held accountable for their children, the neighborhoods aren't held accountable for their own residents, and the government isn't held accountable for anything.

    Wow, sorry for the big ol' long rant.
         
        03-22-2010, 08:38 PM
      #19
    Green Broke
    My children get spanked if they put themselves or someone else in danger or if they are timed out for the same thing more than twice. I try my hardest not to spank. Usually I can just turn the mommy stare on them and whatever they are doing wrong stops. They know when I have to spank that means it's something serious. I haven't spanked my oldest (7) in years. He's gotten to the point where he knows better and if he doesn't then he gets his stuff taken away. He DOES NOT get the stuff back. I keep it and pass it down. That's how it is.

    You can't win for losing. If you child acts up in the store people stare at you and give you dirty looks. If you put your child in a time out in the store you get looks. If you spank you get looks. So in order for me to get shopping done (because I was leaving every time one of the kids started a tantrum but now I have 4 so I'd be out of there in minutes, I'd never get anything done) I have to remember to ignore people's stares.

    Trust me I get a lot of stares because I have one of those backpack "leash" things for my two year old because he is a runner. You'd think I was walking him around with a choke chain and a cattle prod.
         
        03-22-2010, 10:10 PM
      #20
    Yearling
    I was spanked and turned out fine. omg...
    Taught me respect and put the "fear of getting spanked" in my head. I haven't been spanked in 5-6 years but I still remember almost every spanking that I did receive wether it was for lying,cursing or throwing a fit. Etc

    I was raised to respect and obey my parents. I never looked at spanking like I was being beaten and abused like some parents claim that spanking is. I also never had bruises from spanking, maybe a temporary red mark. But my parents never did smack me in my face. Thankfully
         

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