Embarrassed in restaurant - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 04:05 PM Thread Starter
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Embarrassed in restaurant

Kindly neighbors took me out for brekky, a birthday present. The waitress was bringing the food and before she was finished, my two hosts began to pray, asking their god to bless their food and all who prepared it. The waitress was basically stuck in mid stride and didn't know whether to ignore it or feign respect. We were both embarrassed by this. The hosts were so intent on their prayer they had no regard if it jeopardised the waitress's job or embarrassed other patrons. This is arrogance at it's finest.
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post #2 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 04:28 PM
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Annoying. Unfortunately some do not appreciate that others do not want to be involved in their beliefs. It's a shame really that people can be so close minded and forceful, but all you can do is ignore it.

I hate religion being pushed on other people. I very much moved to the wrong country as my DD has to be involved with the catholic church to go to school. I feel it is a personal choice, and it is one of my "irks" about staying in this country.

Stop for a minute, open your mind, learn. You may not agree with what I say, I may not agree with what you say but we will both learn something new.
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post #3 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 05:02 PM
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Did you know your neighbors were Religious?

Have you ever been to their House and they prayed before a meal?

Sorry, but if you knew they were Religious and it offends you then maybe you should have declined the invitation to eat with them.

An estimated 80% of the people in the World believe in some kind of Religion and over half of those pray over a meal.

If you or the waitress are not religious ignore them and go on with your life.

To say they are arrogant for following there faith is beyond belief

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post #4 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 05:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Maple View Post
I hate religion being pushed on other people.
Pushed? Did they say anyone must join in the Prayer?, did they put a gun to your head to be quiet while they prayed?

Ignore it, just like the guy on the street corner handing out pamphlets, ignore them.

If someone has a beer in a group setting and someone does not drink, does that make the drinker pushy?

If someone talks about a soccer game in a group setting and one of the people there hates soccer, is the person who talks about Soccer pushy?

I find Intolerance of other people worse than being pushy or arrogant

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post #5 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 05:38 PM
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As a server, I think it is a little strange for people to pray in restaurants. ESPECIALLY when we are still at the table. Like... really? What are we supposed to do while all the tables around you stare? Should we leave? Should we stop serving you food? Should we stand there awkwardly and wait for your to finish? It's kind of disrespectful...

The sensitivity of the internet baffles me.
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post #6 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 05:39 PM
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Since they took you out for your birthday I don't know that you can say too much about it. Just decline the invitation if it was something you don't want to go through next time! I was taken to lunch with a friend and her parents to Olive Garden before the girl and I were to catch a plane, and the three of them prayed beforehand. I had no idea that the girl was religious. Bless the food, bless us, the staff, the trip that we were about to take, the like. It was a bit uncomfortable for me as I was just sitting there, but they weren't loud about it and didn't ask me to participate. They also paid for my meal at the end, which they were in no way obligated to do!

Now, if they were overly loud about it, pushed you or the waitress to actively participate, judged you for not participating, or made a scene about it then I could see why embarrassment could definitely be warranted. I don't see how just saying a food prayer in your presence is being arrogant, but I HAVE seen times when it definitely can be.
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post #7 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 06:13 PM Thread Starter
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Here's the thing. My father was a fully ordained, highly educated United Church minister. There is no way ever would he have made a public spectacle of his beliefs. As kids, he told us that if we wanted to pray, or say grace, it would be fine to do it in the car before we went in. In the Bible, Jesus says to closet your beliefs - to keep it to yourself. They forget about that passage. Praying over food had it's origins in the Jewish faith many centuries ago. The food was sold in open air markets and a Rabbi would inspect then bless the meat which meant it was safe to eat. Somehow it's at every meal and few are Jewish. As for dining with these folks again, no I won't be. I don't like all the attention their praying attracts, the dirty looks from both staff and patrons. And yes, when talking quietly to the waitress, I was reminded to hush, that they were praying.
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post #8 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 06:18 PM
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If anyone was rude it was the patrons giving dirty looks!

Look away, go hide, simply ignore it if it's soooo offensive. Sheesh. Would you have thought the same way if they were Jewish? Or if a Muslim prayed at noon? probably not.
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post #9 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 06:31 PM
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Wow. I mean, I am not religious either. But to say it's disrespectful for a group of Christians to quietly pray at a table before dinner? My dad and stepmother do it too. Why is it such a big deal? Who cares if they get looks? They are respecting your right NOT to pray, and you should respect their right to do so.

Were they asking and pushing you to join in, or the waitress, or being unruly loud about it - then it's a bit disrespectful. But can't you just give them a minute to do a quiet prayer when it obviously is important to them? It seems that, unless I'm missing something, they WERE keeping it to themselves.

I see you've already decided not to dine with them again - so I won't go into the "if you don't like it don't go" bit I would have otherwise. But I have seen many other things I would consider offensive - the situation you were describing certainly does not fit the category!
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post #10 of 63 Old 04-05-2014, 06:35 PM
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It would embarrass me, in fact if I knew someone was going to be praying in a restaurant with me at the table, I would leave or decline the invite. But I think in all reality, no one else really cared.
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