Family rant, need to get some things off my chest - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 05:27 PM
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That hand gun class will always be there... Your 80 y/o grandfather won't. If they are that upset about you not being there it obviously means something to your family!
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post #12 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 05:51 PM
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It sounds like what you're really upset about is your stepmother sticking her nose in it. As a stepmom myself I stay way the hell out of "family business", KWIM? I certainly have opinions but I keep them to myself, lol.

You must decide to be at peace with your decision, make a trip as soon as possible to have a special one-on-one birthday visit with your grandparent, and mentally tell your stepmother to go to hell. She is obviously trying to make you feel bad--why give her that power?

I'm the wild child in my family, too, and occasionally have scheduling problems that prevent me from attending family events. I am the only one who A) ever moved away from the home town, B) works odd hours (7PM -7AM) including weekends and holidays, C) has to plan my work schedule 2 months in advance, and D) never had children (gasp! I KNOW!). I've decided that everyone else just has to deal with it. I am almost 50 for crying out loud.

Just out of curiosity, is the handgun class something you have to do for your job, or just for yourself?
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post #13 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 05:56 PM Thread Starter
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Yes I am pissed that she stuck her nose in it. I asked her why no one ever made anefdort to come see us, her and my father included, and she told me that was just part of life. The class is for myself, I don't have to have it for work. Every since I got followed home from work, I feel its something I need to have ASAP. There was no openings for months but I signed up anyways. When they had some cancellations, they moved me to saturday.
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post #14 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 08:42 PM
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Go to your class. Schedule some time w/the g/parent as soon as you can & let the rest go. We arent' Superman, & can only do so much.
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post #15 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 09:26 PM
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the only thing a grudge will do , is make the person who is holding it sick. It does nothing to the other person. No family is 'functional' Some may be better than others but thats life. You need to forgive people . Dont expect an 80 yr old to drive to you. You seem to dislike your Step Mother . My suggestion is that you put the past in the past and move forward. If your class is not an 8 hr class, then get your hiney over to see GP . If you canno tdo it on the same day, then go over On Sunday and take Him some fruit or something.
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post #16 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 09:39 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by stevenson View Post
the only thing a grudge will do , is make the person who is holding it sick. It does nothing to the other person. No family is 'functional' Some may be better than others but thats life. You need to forgive people . Dont expect an 80 yr old to drive to you. You seem to dislike your Step Mother . My suggestion is that you put the past in the past and move forward. If your class is not an 8 hr class, then get your hiney over to see GP . If you canno tdo it on the same day, then go over On Sunday and take Him some fruit or something.
It is an 8 hour class.

I dont expect them to, but I do know they are perfectly able, they drive long distances on a regular basis.

I visit them on a regular basis.

I do dislike my step mom at times because of things like this. Everytime I try to let something go, she angers me again in someway. The last time I talked to her was months ago when she called to tell me my dads father had a stroke. And she called to tell me she was sad because her dog died. It seems like tge only time I hear from her is when something bad happens.

If we had a closer relationship, then yeah and call me and talk about why I am not coming. But we don't, so don't text me and act nasty before you ask what is going on.
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post #17 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 09:47 PM
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you need to let go of your anger. You will end up with ulcers or even worse, you could cause yourself to stroke out. The anger can overflow to other areas of your life before you realize it. Try calling your step mom and dad once a week, just to say hi, how ya doing. thats good.. make it short, make it sweet. If they tell you bad news, its irritating, but say how awful it is, and then just change the subject to something nice.
and when you are real irritated... remember this..
you can choose your friends not your family, and you can change your hair and your underwear but you cannot change your friends and family. ;)

Last edited by stevenson; 02-15-2013 at 09:49 PM.
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post #18 of 19 Old 02-15-2013, 10:21 PM Thread Starter
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Lol, I think I already have ulcers. When I get mad or irritated I get awful indegestion. Your right, I can't change them. Is it ok just to ignore them completly? ( not the grandparents) I did a test once and stopped calling and texting just to see what would happen. I went 8 months without seeing my dad or step mom. Then I broke down and went to visit, because it was obvi that they wernt going to do.it.
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post #19 of 19 Old 02-16-2013, 02:40 AM
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indigestion like that is bad. it can lead to more serious problems.
Family issues are hard to deal with, Everyone has them. Some family members are like a holes. everyone has them no one wants to hear them..lol
You can take the high road and call once a week /month. be sweet be short.
and you win. I have some issues with family members, and get soo pissed off at times. a rant , and a brief break seems to help. I just have to always remember my own advice ! lol..and I am almost 60 .
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