Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Loudoun County, VA
My concern would be that the way you have worded it comes off very negative, and contradicts itself. The man shown on your site looks bulky, not the lean look you are advertising. I work out at a gym, and the people I see with personal trainers are the ones that want their hands held, and want it to be as enjoyable an experience as possible. The people who are already serious about working out have enough motivation to work out alone.
It just comes off as kind of arrogant to assume immediately that people aren't good enough for your services. When you are providing a service like this, you have to cater to what your client needs, or risk getting very little business.
Wording needs editing and formatting as well. The first letter of every word in a sentence shouldn't be capitalized.