I'm going for treatment... Bullying. *Slightly long* - Page 5 - The Horse Forum
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post #41 of 62 Old 03-01-2012, 02:35 PM
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I always feel almost furious when I hear about stories like that. It's just so easy to bully that other person, just think that it's so fun without thinking what it really does to the other person.

You're a strong young lady, carry your scars with proud and a mark of it that you survived these people, cutting and your issues. Since I'm sure that even it wouldn't be easy, you'll do it. Also I'm sure that your story can help some people in the same situation so thanks for sharing it.

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona - Varjo seuraa onneain

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post #42 of 62 Old 03-01-2012, 03:23 PM
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I'm not sure what to say...I'm shocked that kids can be that mean to each other and I think that when they mature they will regret their actions. Words can hurt so very badly. On the other hand, you are very brave for sharing your story with us. You are also open to getting help and realize that you have a problem and for that you should be proud of yourself! I can tell from what you have written that you are a strong young woman and that you WILL overcome this! It is apparent that you have two very good friends who will stick by you and help you in any way that they can. (And, in my opinion, a couple of close friends are better than lots of acquaintances.) Stay strong, ride as much as possible and keep us updated:) *Hugs*
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post #43 of 62 Old 03-01-2012, 03:44 PM
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So sorry to hear what you're going through. It WILL get better, you just have to believe it will. We're all here for you!
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post #44 of 62 Old 03-01-2012, 11:51 PM Thread Starter
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Thank you so much for your support everyone.

A rumor was spread about me a few days ago, that I am a liar about everything I say, and that my rehab visit is an attention seeker or worse, a drug related trip, non of which is true! I don't know how anyone found out, as I kept it under wraps so that people wouldn't make assumptions about it, which they already have. So that is being spread around, and while I am trying to ignore it, it is making my life miserable at school. I sit on my own at breaks, because no one wants to be associated with the "druggy". My one best friend doesn't go to my school, and my other best friend has many other friends, so I can't expect him to sit with me everyday. The thing is that he knows about these things that are being said about me, and yet he doesn't sit with me. I know that sounds very selfish and immature, but I really need him right now, and for the past few days I feel like he hasn't been there for me, if that makes any sense? I don't know who it was that started it... The only people that knew are my family, who would most definitely not say anything, and my two friends, who I also trust did not say anything. My mom is trying to find out who is doing it, as they keep slipping hurtful notes into my locker and my desks in classes, and I am really starting to feel down and bad about myself, which is what I am trying to fix, and my family is so desperate to avoid.

I spoke about what I have been going through lately, yesterday to my entire grade, under advice of my therapist and teachers, and I saw that some people clearly thought I was attention seeking, and that it was a huge joke. When I realized that that is what people think of me, I felt terrible. I started to cry, and shake, and I tried to cut my wrists in the bathroom. I was stopped, and I'm okay, but I still feel terrible. I can't miss any school as it is my final year and exams are coming up soon, so I have to face school. I try to be strong and ignore them, but it's hard. My therapist comes with me to school now, mostly because they are worried that I am suicidal after what I attempted to do yesterday, but also so that I will have someone to talk to at breaks.

So all in all, I had a major breakdown, but I am not going to give up.

Every girl wants their own LOVE STORY, I found mine... :)
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post #45 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 01:13 AM
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Originally Posted by LoveStory10 View Post
my other best friend has many other friends, so I can't expect him to sit with me everyday. The thing is that he knows about these things that are being said about me, and yet he doesn't sit with me. I know that sounds very selfish and immature, but I really need him right now, and for the past few days I feel like he hasn't been there for me, if that makes any sense?
It doesn't sound selfish or immature at all. It sounds like he is not being a good friend to you, and you deserve better. I am so sorry that you are suffering through all of this Love Story. I don't even know what to say, except for I believe that you can fight through this and get better. You are so strong to have made it this far, and you are absolutely strong enough to survive until school ends. Everyone here is here for you, just remember that. ((((((Hugs from california))))))

"Anything is possible, if you have enough nerve" -JK Rowling
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post #46 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 02:08 AM
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Your one friend doesn't sound like much of a friend my bet is, is that that friend is the one who spilled the beans. Your feelings are not selfish at all. You expect your friends to be there when they need you and it often hurts when they are not. I'm sorry that people are being so rude to you about this. People can be so immature. It seems like no matter who you are, if you receive mental health services everyone always assumes it's for attention try to hang in there and I'm glad to hear that you are not giving up! Be strong, you CAN get through this

My horse's feet are as swift as rolling thunder He carries me away from all my fears And when the world threatens to fall asunder His mane is there to wipe away my tears.
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post #47 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 02:27 AM
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Girl I would sit with yu every break and break everyone's nose and knock their front teeth. I'm not saying violence is an answer but where I come from a good old fashion a$$kicking will straighten people up.

Fortunately I was the popular kid and high school. I was the captain of the football team and president and everyone looked up to me. I didn't care what people thought about me. If I saw a person bullying a nerd or loser or whatever. I would stop it and have some words. They would leave them alone for the rest of the day. And I would wait for them in the parking lot after school. And when they came out they would get the snot Jammed in their brain. And alot of people thought it was uncool to stick up for the "losers"

Well I will tell you it's not! It's the right thing to do. I gained alot of respect and was well liked and friends with all and I will tell you what. People didn't bully or pick on people when I was around because they knew they had to face someone their own size.

So love story 10 if you ever have a problem or anything feel free to pm me and I will talk to you. I will help you work thought it. I'm sure you a gorgeous girl and you don't give your self credit. Be strong I'm thinking about you.

That made my blood boil. Brought back the old days smashing ignorant people's faces in :)
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post #48 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 06:44 AM
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That is infuriating. But you're stronger than them.

Do you have any alternatives like switching schools or even home schooling? Sometimes you just have to remove yourself from the situation. And by all means, keep talking to us here, where you have a solid support network. I think it is a good thing that you spoke out about what's going on - there may have been some insensitive ones - typical of youth - but I guarantee there are many who's lives you touched, even if they don't yet realize it. And it is good to talk out your feelings - it helps you make sense of things and reduces the pressure you put on yourself. So keep it coming! There are many of us who will help you through it.
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post #49 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 09:45 AM
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Hey Lovestory... I've been following this thread, but not saying anything...

And don't take me wrong please!! I have been through my fair share of torture by other kids and adults, eating disorders, mental illnesses, therapy, medication, the lot! I think very few people get through this life unscathed... Especially these days, I think every second person has a struggle...

But perhaps you need a different perspective: This is mine... And I want to put it the best way possible. Maybe you should just decide to be stronger than this. High School may seem important, but it's nothing, I promise you! And when you graduate, your life is just starting! So don't sweat it now... these people around you, are kids themselves, and they mean nothing to your life in the long run. They need not have any permanent effect on your life... they are not worth it.

The very coolest, most creative, most interesting and above all, most SUCCESSFUL people I know now, were picked on at school etc. They become GREAT people because they don't just get what they want (like the 'cool and popular and pretty' kids at school!), and this builds character and ambition. I promise you, that out of high school, when life really starts, you can turn over a new leaf... and be anything you want! These people will be, and should be, forgotten!

I know its hard, but girl, I think you need to consciously start to rise above this. Tell yourself every day (and out loud!) that what people say and what they think doesn't matter, and that you will never let them see that they can hurt or humiliate you. Don't sit alone at break, and allow the thoughts to overcome you... go find something to do... keep yourself occupied... learn something new... chat with your friends on the horseforum... go to the library... anything except wallowing and thinking and internalising.

I know this is getting long, but perhaps I can make an example from my own life. Not the same thing, but when I started riding again as an adult, I knew that I wasn't as fearless as a kid, and not as skilled as my adult contemporaries, and I wanted to catch up fast!

So I told myself that I would never admit fear, even if I felt it dreadfully! (and I was so afraid at times) and to never say "No" to my trainer when asked to do something. So I was asked to ride some scary horses, and I said "yes", and was asked to jump higher than I ever have: "yes!", fell off and got back on, and asked to do that scary thing once more "yes!". And so forth.

And not very long afterwards I caught myself... not being afraid! At all!

Not just pretending to not be afraid... I just wasn't. And I'm not. At all. It's weird, but I manifested it, and now it's as real as my eyes are brown.

Silly example but the moral of the story is: you will believe what you tell yourself, and if you tell yourself something positive all the time, you will become it! It's hard I know! But this change has to start with you, and you'll see, other people will start to believe you too!

I have a friend who gives me great perspective when I feel like crumbling, he doesn't hug me or baby me, he just says in a stern voice: ''Muumi, put your big girl panties on!'' or "Man the **** up!'' and these days I appreciate it more than anything else.

And in closing... some inspirational art: It's a good place to start...

PS. apologies also for the long and slightly obnoxious post...
PPS. !!hugs!!
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post #50 of 62 Old 03-02-2012, 10:02 AM
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PPS. I'm relatively close by, in Joburg, so if you need anything, a chat, whatever... pm me your details and I'll send you mine. I mean it.
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