HI, I don’t know where else to put this so I put it here. I am really looking for support here. Seems easier to tell allot of people you don’t know at all then my family. So here it goes.
I am about to turn 20 years old (Nov. 19th) I was adopted at the age of 18 months old. I was taken out of my birth mothers home at the age of four months from many CPS calls. I was severely malnutrition and under weight and sick. I was rushed to the hospital and put on life support and given the totally of failure to thrive. They where pretty much waiting for me to die. I beat the odds and got strong and healthy.
My birth mother, an alcoholic to the extreme would be found passed out blacked out not taking care of any of us (I am the youngest of 4 other siblings) We were all put into the same foster home, the twins who are a year and half older then me got adopted out together, and my oldest sister was old enough to stay with her, over the age of 16. Katie my sister who is next oldest then the twins had it the roughest but that is a whole other story and not mine to tell. I was adopted out first and into a wonderful home, single mom who couldn’t have raised me better and thanks to her I have been riding since I was four years old and she has supported 110% my passion for horses!
Back to the point...
Anyways today I got an email from Katie. Who I had a falling out with before summer started (we have had an on off relationship for a few years) anyways she I guess took on a search for our birth mother (oh forgot to add in the part of my siblings and I all have different fathers)
So I guess she found her....and she talked to her for hours. I am very happy it worked out for both of them, I personally think my sister really needed this closure given our extreme start to life and hers taking a turn for the worse when mine kept getting better.
So I guess my mom, Debbie lives in FL. Has been sober for a few years now. So after reading my sisters email and crying (yes I told my mom about this) I got the courage to email my birthmother (I got it from my sister) so I emailed her...I told her I didn’t want to meet her right away and that emails where all I can emotionally handle right now, and here is where I want to start crying again. Been (in just 2 hours from finding out) a huge roller coaster of emotions...and I hate it.
I don’t know what to think expect or do.