Okay so I just thought I would let all this out because I'm not great at talking to people about things I keep it bottled up and it just makes everything worse. I end up fighting with people who have nothing to do with my problems or even on my horses and that makes me more upset because they shouldn't be involved in my problems.
Okay so on Christmas day my dad and the whole family found out that my mam had been cheating on my dad for basically their whole marriage with loads of different men. She doesn't seem to realise what she did to me my sister and my brother or even my dad she seems to think everything is fine with us. She never asks us how we feel or how we are doing, never makes time to try to talk to us or anything like that just goes off with her stupid boyfriend who helped ruin my life. To top things off my dad has just lost his job as well and is finding it hard to pay the bills, and my mother won't pay for anything, dad gives my money if I ever go to town or the cinema and gives me money every day for school and for getting presents and stuff if I don't have any money he also gives me pocket money which I told him to stop giving me because its not fair on him but he won't, I asked mam for money for town and stuff before but she didn't have any at that time. She tries to make out that her situation is so much worse than ours even though she only has to take care of herself and she has a steady job when dad doesn't have any income right now and has to take care of me my sister my brother and our 7 horses along with horses he breaks in for people but he only gets those ocasionally and they end up costing more than they pay because of feeding them and all.
I just can't handle any of this any more. I am 15 years old and in third year in Ireland so I have major exams this year then two more years left then more major exams then its off to college. I am being pressured by teachers friends and other people to have to know what to do with my life what job I want what course I need for that job what college has those courses I just don't know if I can take it any more, I have to study for exams, try to figure out my life after our family problems, and take care of around six horses now I just don't know what to do.
Oh and sorry for the novel cookies for people who read it.