You know, there is a difference between parenting and controlling. Parenting to me is guiding with the goal of raising independent , self-sufficient, capable adults. Yes, that involves at a point in the child's development of trust and faith. Allowing them some room to make decisions, and if it was a less then wonderful one, suffering the repercussions of that decision.
Controlling to me is not allowing the child to develop into anything other than what you have predetermined he/she will be. Micro managing every little step no matter how small. This does not prepare the child for anything life will throw at them, and when they hit college, look out! Have actually seen (sister-in-law) this type of "parenting" when her oldest son went to college. She and her husband were on the computer tracking when he was on and when his classes were to determine if he made it to class and how late he was up.
He flunked out his first semester. The colleges call these types of parents, "helicopter" parents, because they constantly hover over the child.
And lastly, no matter how great your parenting skills are, the child must be willing to meet you halfway. Myself and my 3 siblings were raised the same, values ect...My youngest brother (deceased) battled addiction for many years starting at the ripe old age of 10. My mother has never stopped beating herself up for "failing" him in some way. Doesn't matter what the rest of us say to her, she feels she failed him. Each child is different and some will meet you halfway and some will take a mile when you give an inch.
Parenting is not easy, but it is one of the most rewarding, frustrating, joyous and at times, yes thankless jobs out there. I am grateful to have experienced it and have 2 wonderful children. I am looking forward to watching our children raise the next generation and hope I am able to participate (even in a small way).