lack of parental guidance in today's kids? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 07:57 PM
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Parents have been accused of being "old fashioned" since the beginning of time! But, the big question is , who is accusing them of being old fashioned? The child.

Never stopped my parents from parenting and it didn't stop me either when I was raising my children. Now I laugh because I am hearing the same song from my son and his wife when they discuss what will and will not be allowed with their daughter.

I just smile. :)
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post #12 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 08:01 PM
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I think you are being a wonderful mother. As everyone has said already, there are way too many crazies out there and children can so easily get swept into that. I do believe that kids need more supervision. You are doing what you need to do to protect yours. Kudos to you! Keep doing what you are doing :)

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post #13 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 08:49 PM
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I think it's good that you're not letting them run wild and watch porn etc...
but you could put a bit of trust in them

I'm 18 and my dad has checked our computer weekly since before i can remember to make sure we (my brothers and i) haven't been going on anything we shouldn't, i had a myspace profile when i was younger and i never betrayed my parents trust by - talking to strangers, giving out details, meeting people from the internet ect... If you just spoke to your children and told them not to accept friend requests from strangers, give out their details etc im sure they would cooperate.

I actually think it's quite appalling that you know their passwords and check everything of theirs, if you're so worried about myspace and facebook -block the sites, at the end of the day if a stranger gets in touch with them they can report the person and/or block them, and you can make private profiles so that no-one can see your information other than approved friends.

But i suppose that's why i have such a good relationship with my parents - because they trust me and i am happy that they do, i still tell my mum pretty much everything that goes off in my life and if i ever have a problem i wont go to my friends i'll go to my parents because we have a very good relationship.
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post #14 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 09:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hollybee View Post
I think it's good that you're not letting them run wild and watch porn etc...
but you could put a bit of trust in them

I'm 18 and my dad has checked our computer weekly since before i can remember to make sure we (my brothers and i) haven't been going on anything we shouldn't, i had a myspace profile when i was younger and i never betrayed my parents trust by - talking to strangers, giving out details, meeting people from the internet ect... If you just spoke to your children and told them not to accept friend requests from strangers, give out their details etc im sure they would cooperate.

I actually think it's quite appalling that you know their passwords and check everything of theirs, if you're so worried about myspace and facebook -block the sites, at the end of the day if a stranger gets in touch with them they can report the person and/or block them, and you can make private profiles so that no-one can see your information other than approved friends.

But i suppose that's why i have such a good relationship with my parents - because they trust me and i am happy that they do, i still tell my mum pretty much everything that goes off in my life and if i ever have a problem i wont go to my friends i'll go to my parents because we have a very good relationship.

I agree with everything you said.

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post #15 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 09:16 PM
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^I agree with above^

It's great to keep a watch on your kids, but you NEED trust in your kids. If my mom knew all my passwords, accounts, and read everything I wrote, I would resent her. And, I would much worse things then what you can on the internet. To be perfectly honest, being THAT nosey is a good way to drive your kid away.

Talk to them about being smart, consequences, and ecourage them to TELL you things, not dig into their personal life and never give them any freedom.

I have friends with parents like that, and they resent them to no end. More then one find "freedom" from their parents in other ways (sex, drugs, alcohol).

Guidance is good, be smart, don't be naive, but TRUST your kids. 99.999999% of kids will do something you don't like, no matter how strict and invasive you are. By restricting them at home, you set them up to find freedom away from home
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post #16 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 09:37 PM
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i have a almost 13year old daughter and we have a great relationship BUT I to know all her passwords and her user names not to snoop but just in case something god forbid did happen i would have all that info. You are being a good mom and i applaud you in that. I trust my daughter what i dont trust is everyone else.

i have my bloodhound & my horses what more can a girl ask for?
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post #17 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 09:54 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
I trust my daughter what i dont trust is everyone else.
Ditto. I knew I'd ruffle the feathers of the younger people here, but I'm simply talking about computer use. I don't lock them in their rooms and give them their meals through a window. You're appalled by my restrictions? I'm appalled by the the way their friends are allowed to do whatever they want and the way they talk to adults with disrespect. Their parents are more concerned about being their friends than their parents. I don't find you're comments offensive, I welcome your perspective.

Thanks to all the other hardass parents for your support! Walkamile, it is funny how history repeats itself! ;)

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post #18 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 10:00 PM
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My parents monitor my facebook
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post #19 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 10:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3neighs View Post
Ditto. I knew I'd ruffle the feathers of the younger people here, but I'm simply talking about computer use. I don't lock them in their rooms and give them their meals through a window. You're appalled by my restrictions? I'm appalled by the the way their friends are allowed to do whatever they want and the way they talk to adults with disrespect. Their parents are more concerned about being their friends than their parents. I don't find you're comments offensive, I welcome your perspective.

Thanks to all the other hardass parents for your support! Walkamile, it is funny how history repeats itself! ;)
Wait the parenting guide clearly stated to feed my children though a window..I am confused

Yes mother always said "You just wait your children will be 10 times worse" and "You are the kind of child that drew your own line then crossed it" All very true.... very very true LOL I am sorry Mother.

It's funny I had an older gentlemen shocked by the fact my children at the age of 5 and 7 stated Yes Sir to him upon most of his questions. It's all in the way you are raised I suppose.

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post #20 of 98 Old 08-18-2009, 10:27 PM
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lack of parental guidance in today's kids?

[quote=Heybird;381919]Wait the parenting guide clearly stated to feed my children though a window..I am confused
Lol,


Yes mother always said "You just wait your children will be 10 times worse" and "You are the kind of child that drew your own line then crossed it" All very true.... very very true LOL I am sorry Mother.

My Mother used to say "I hope you have a child just like you"

Well, I do (sometimes I think worse)..lol

I agree that there are way too many as my husband says "wack jobs" out there especially on the internet. There are so many cases of online predators that it is very scarey for a parent to even think about how these people can find ways to contact our children.
My daughter has a computer in her room , but no internet ...she can play games , Word, and use the paint program but she is not allowed on the internet with out my knowledge or supervision. She is 10 and Myspace and facebook , chat rooms etc... are totally out of the question. I dont even feel comfortable having her pic on the internet either. If it is , her face is not shown. I dont agree with children that young having cell phones either, my teenage nieces have them but they are 16 & 18 and use them to contact my sister of there whereabouts ,work etc...if they were to abuse the use of the phone I am sure my sister would put a stop to that.
I know that at some point she may start to argue with me about the internet use but as I often have said "I am your Mother ,not your friend"

I totally agree that it is our job as parents to keep our children as safe as we possibly can.

Horses and children, I often think, have a lot of the good sense there is in the world.
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