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Motorcycle crash renders me unsupportive

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    02-24-2013, 11:06 AM
Yeah. I agree with the above posters though I do get where the OP is coming from. My spouse bought his first Harley 2 years ago and although it terrifies me I support him. I was a paramedic and in LE for years so I have a lot of first hand experience with seeing the aftermath of motorcycle accidents. I had literal panic attacks the first few times I rode with him, but I've gotten better about it. Still not comfy with riding the motorcycle but I do support his hobby.

Want to know the ironic part? He got into horses because of me and seriously fractured his left wrist last fall after getting thrown off (moments after the pic in my avatar was taken). Love him for not throwing THAT back in my face LOL.
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    02-24-2013, 11:24 AM
I've ridden horses (off and on) most of my life, got my first motorcycle last summer at age 53. Be supportive. If he's over riding his skill level, that would be cause for concern. Rather than saying "get rid of your bike, it's dangerous", what about suggesting he take a rider safety course? I took basic rider safety before I got my bike (I had NEVER ridden before) and it has been invaluable. My husband took it with me, he needed a refresher after not having ridden for years.
    02-24-2013, 12:31 PM
I just find it a little strange that one could wake up one morning and be "passionate" about motorcycles. He's still making payments on the bike. It's not something that he bought outright. So while I may spend thousands and thousands of dollars a month on my horse, it's money that I have to spend. My horse is not owned by the bank, and isn't under the constraints of what an insurance company decides is covered or not. So if the insurance company decides that the bike isn't worth as much as he owes, then he's upside-down. Or if they decide that the bike can be fixed and not totaled out, then he's stuck with a bike that he'll never be able to sell due to it having been in a bad crash. For instance, would you buy a car with a salvage title?

And if we can touch briefly on the subject of horse riding accidents vs. motorcycle accidents:
Book of Odds: The Dangers of Hog & Horse Accidents

Per capita, horses are 20 times more dangerous. Which I understand. However look at the stats for deadly motorcycle accidents. I would venture to believe that most of us know at least one person that has either been critically injured or killed on a motorcycle. While I personally, don't know anyone (thank goodness) whom has been killed by their horse. Has every single one of my riding friends been thrown 100+ times, yes. But hospitalized, no.
    02-24-2013, 12:44 PM
Originally Posted by Oxer    
i just find it a little strange that one could wake up one morning and be "passionate" about motorcycles...
I started riding horses at 50...

Sure takes up a big part of my life now!
MN Tigerstripes likes this.
    02-24-2013, 12:46 PM
^^ really? I can't imagine learning to ride as an adult. The older I get, the less I like to fall off. My body doesn't heal the way it did when I was a kid.
nvr2many likes this.
    02-24-2013, 12:51 PM
Green Broke
Well I am naive. I never really thought of riding horses being that dangerous. Always thought motorcycles would top it. Anyway, as soon as we can afford it I would like to get my hubby a motorcycle. He would love one. I will worry but I will support him.
    02-24-2013, 12:59 PM
Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it's impossible. Have you talked to him about this 'sudden passion'?

Your money arguments make no sense to me, the horse market is pretty poopy right now and horses like to hurt themselves, if your horse gets hurt chances are its worth less than his damaged motorcycle, and while you might be spending money you 'have'- the bank was willing to finance him, they don't usually do that for people who won't be able to pay, personally I would rather finance something like that if I had the option and it was convenient for me to pay off.

The bottom line is- motorcycles are dangerous and can be expensive, horses are dangerous an are very expensive, being unsupportive f him in his passion (no matter how new it is) while he supports you in yours is a sure fire way to damage your relationship.
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MN Tigerstripes likes this.
    02-24-2013, 01:07 PM
I am short on time right now, but I will answer later when I am work & have time, lol (work huh?). My hubby rides and has crashed, I will give you my perspective on it, might help you.
    02-24-2013, 01:07 PM
He didn't just wake up one morning and suddenly decide to get into motorcycles, I guarantee he's been thinking about it for quite some time and just now told you. Now he has to get the experience needed to ride how he wants. Let me ask you a question, at 5, after 6 months of riding would you have climbed up on a thouroughbred at the racetrack and raced around the track? That's essentially what he did and a common mistake among new bike riders (Yes I rode one for years before getting into horses). Just like new horse people buy a horse that's to much for them, new bike riders buy a bike that's to much for them.

My suggestion, don't lay down the law about him riding. If he listens to you he'll likely end up deeply resenting you making him give up something he enjoys. That can lead to some major blowups about other topics but the root is in him giving up the bike and likely it will be over your horses. If he doesn't listen to you and you insist it will end up in some major blowups. So instead (don't nag) suggest he starts riding a less powerful bike until he gets more experience and to take some riding instructions. Also helps to get a cheap to repair used bike for learning on.

Here's another bit of information for you when it comes to bikes. There are two types of bike riders. Those who have laid their bike down and those who lie about having laid their bike down.
MN Tigerstripes, bsms and boots like this.
    02-24-2013, 01:08 PM
Count me in the irrational and hypocritical camp. My husband knows that if he buys a bike he will never hear the end of it. I know a lot more horse riders than bike riders, but of those I know zero equestrians who've been killed, but multiple bikers who've been killed. It's not him I don't trust, it's the idiots who don't look where they're going who scare the crap out of me. He is a decent driver but not a defensive enough driver for a bike, so no bike. Dirt is a lot kinder than concrete and car bumpers.
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Oxer likes this.

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