Ok. Don't really know where to start. I should have titled it "ex" friend. I've had this friend for about 10 years. We used to be really close, like as in our whole family. Our daughters were best friends, our husbands were best friends, and my friend and I were best friends. We have even went on vacation together as a family three times.
Here lately she has not really been a great friend. Probably at least within the last 2-3 years we have kind of been, slowly drifting apart. She is usually a pretty busy person and I did try to keep that in mind. But with texting and facebook, which she does all the time on her phone, you would think she could at least send a text or something to say hey or how are you doing. I am always the one who calls or text first. And I mean, I have waited, weeks to see if she would text me first. She always replies back at first, but as the conversation goes on a little she stops. And I am kinda left hanging like ok, guess she is done. I mean if we were supposed to be best friends, that's what best friends do, is need each other just because and call or text out of the blue if you haven't heard from each other in a while, right??. The only time she text me first seems to be when she needs something. I just have been feeling like I am putting everything in the friendship and not getting anything back. My husband knows I have been upset like as in, in tears about it. And thinks she is not a very good friend. She seems to be an all about herself type of person. That makes my husband upset because he doesn't like to see me hurt.
Her and her husband have been having trouble and fighting a lot (another time when she seems to want to hang out with me) We drank a few beers one day at my house when she was all aggravated at her husband and she knows that my husband really didn't want me hanging out with her anymore. She was quite drunk and my husband got home from work saw she was drunk and then went and got her husband to take her home. That really ticked her off, so there was a big old spat with her and my husband kicked her out of our house because she was flipping out on him wanting to know why we couldn't hang out, he was trying to explain and she kept getting louder and louder and cussing. He told her she needed to leave, she kept going and she lifted her hand up to hit him and he literally picked her up and put her outside! Wow! I talked to her about it the next day. She said he was dead to her and she was done with him. I explained why he didn't want us to hang out, that I always call her first and she only calls or text if she needs something and he just doesn't think you are a very good friend. She said nothing! So I am like, ok that's nice. Not a good sign. If she is done with my husband and he is dead to her I guess I am too. I mean my hubby is a great guy and he has always been there for me. Unlike her. She wasn't there for me a few months ago when my mom passed away. I mean she did come to the funeral, she text me and asked how she was doing a couple times. My mom was sick for almost 4 months before she passed! I really needed her, like to talk to I am just glad I had my husband then.
But wait, there's more! I found out, like earlier in the day all the above happened. That one of her horses, a young coming three year old was sick. I hadn't talked to her since New Years. This was the first of February when I found out about her horse. She told me he hadn't eaten hay in two weeks only a mixture of sweet feed, corn and beet pulp. For TWO WEEKS!! She said he was skin and bones. She had him in the barn, I went in and to look at him. I really wish I wouldn't have, he looked horrible!! She never even called a vet!! She said that she had tried three different kinds of hay and he wouldn't eat any of it. Now this horse was my favorite horse of hers. He was so sweet and very submissive. I know that all her other horses wouldn't let him eat and he would always just go off by himself in the summer out in the pasture. So I know that is what has happened this winter. Well, as I am sure you figured out I found out a few days later from her step daughter on FB, the horse died (and it was supposedly her horse, the step daughter's that is, but she hadn't been out to see the poor guy in months!) I am mad at myself!! I wish I would have just told her off then! I should have called someone, but I know our animal control really sucks, big time!! He had hay and water in front of him and all her other horses looked fine, it would have taken too long. It was too late by time I found out. Just makes me sick! That is another reason I am done! I would NEVER, EVER treat a horse or any animal this way! If one of my horses didn't eat hay for not even two DAYS I would call my vet! I for sure don't want a friend that would treat an animal like this!
Ok so here is my advice I need. We have always tried to hang out on our birthdays. We both have b-days in March. Her bday is before mine. I don't want to look like the bad person and not wish her a happy birthday in someway. I know I am not going to call her like I usually do or hang out with her. But should I at least send a text or tell her on facebook?? Or just not at all?? I am very hurt and disgusted with her. I am done kissing her butt! I just don't want to look like the jerk, even though I know I am not the one who is the jerk, but that is the way she will see it. I have never told her how I feel. I am one to keep things inside and not talk about it. So there I think I am done, sorry this turned out to be long but I had to get it off of my chest. Thank you to everyone who read all that!