Originally Posted by SlideStop
What if you kid came home bawling because they constantly pick her last. The other kids grown when she put/assigned to their team. Then the call him/her names like "slow sally" or "heifer" in stead of Heather. Then during the game (despite putting up a fair fight) she was targeted by just about everyone else on the team. She/he is targeted and struck out every single game, laughed at and mocked. Now he/she is starting to isolate and stops participating in actives.... You can see how this goes on and on...
There's a difference between giving kids an opportunity to thrive in an organized game where the agenda is to achieve a goal. It makes it hard to really single out one person in softball, swimming and volleyball. The objective of dodge ball is to just hurl balls at kids and it allows ample opportunity for kids to pick on, humiliate and embarrass another child.
Posted via Mobile Device
My daughter HAS come home upset about being picked last, about being called names (anything from Ginormica to Fruit Loop). And this is what I tell her, "1. Are the people that say that to you your friends? Do they talk to you everyday, do they listen to what you have to say, are they your REAL friends, or just kids in your class? Your real friends know who you are, who cares what others say. You've said yourself that you're not good at (insert physical game), so what if you're picked last. You are extremely talented in (insert talents). Does that make you less of a person if you're picked last?
2. You are going to get called names, it's life. People will say things just to hurt you, but you know what? That just hurts them more. They are the ones that will be alone and won't have friends because who wants to be friends with someone like that?
I know it hurts, and you're upset, and you can cry on my shoulder all you want. But tell me, do you think you're Ginormica? Her usual response is "no, I like being tall". Do you think you're a fruit loop? Daughter: "kind of, but I like being silly. It makes my friends laugh, and that makes me happy."
What I am trying to teach her, is not to let bad things that happen to her DEFINE who SHE thinks SHE is. It's ok to be hurt by others opinions & actions, but that it's just that, THEIR opinions & actions.
So what if all the balls are thrown at her in dodgeball, if she lets it bother her, they are just going to keep doing it. If she brushes it off and doesn't give them the enjoyment of getting her all worked up, why would they keep doing it? Kids do things to get a reaction out of others, whatever that reaction may be. If they like the reaction, they keep doing it. If they don't they stop.