parenting advice
 
 

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parenting advice

This is a discussion on parenting advice within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

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        03-18-2012, 04:35 AM
      #1
    Foal
    parenting advice

    Well im not technically a parent, but im the "legal gaurdian" of my little sister. I've pretty much raised her since I was 16, and she moved in with me when I moved out on my own when I was 18.

    She will be 16 in a couple months. I would like to get her a car a little before she gets her license so she can get comfortable with it before she starts driving on her own. I have been looking at the cadillac cts since I've found a few for sale for around 8500 give or take. I was talking with some friends tonight and they all said I was crazy for spending that kind of money for a car for a 16 year old.

    I know that's a lot more than my first car. But I want something reliable for her. And she has been thru a lot with our lack of parents, and never complained. She has straight a's in school. The school has a program that if you maintain a 2.5 gpa and log so many community service hours, she will get 2 years of free community college. She's really focused on that. She works really hard. She also helps me wash and clean my truck and a lot of times does it on her own. I got hurt 3 years ago at work and lost the lower half of my leg and she's helped me out so much. I really feel like she deserves a nice car and would take good care of it.

    Anyway, am I crazy for wanting to spend that much? Usually I feel confident in the decisions I make taking care of her, but I keep going back and forth on this one.
         
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        03-18-2012, 04:45 AM
      #2
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by ls6firebird    
    well im not technically a parent, but im the "legal gaurdian" of my little sister. I've pretty much raised her since I was 16, and she moved in with me when I moved out on my own when I was 18.

    She will be 16 in a couple months. I would like to get her a car a little before she gets her license so she can get comfortable with it before she starts driving on her own. I have been looking at the cadillac cts since I've found a few for sale for around 8500 give or take. I was talking with some friends tonight and they all said I was crazy for spending that kind of money for a car for a 16 year old.

    I know that's a lot more than my first car. But I want something reliable for her. And she has been thru a lot with our lack of parents, and never complained. She has straight a's in school. The school has a program that if you maintain a 2.5 gpa and log so many community service hours, she will get 2 years of free community college. She's really focused on that. She works really hard. She also helps me wash and clean my truck and a lot of times does it on her own. I got hurt 3 years ago at work and lost the lower half of my leg and she's helped me out so much. I really feel like she deserves a nice car and would take good care of it.

    Anyway, am I crazy for wanting to spend that much? Usually I feel confident in the decisions I make taking care of her, but I keep going back and forth on this one.
    Firebird, you should like a great bro I must say. And im 16 in like 2 weeks myself O.o ha ha, but ill try to help you. From what you say about her she's a very well rounded kid, A's in school, community service, and 2.5 GPA. And great she will get 2 years free of community college!! You sound like your very close with her, and I wish I was with my siblings who are much older but 10 and little over 20 years for the other 2. But im going to by my own vehicle for under 2k, but I think if your willing to get her the car she deserves it. Id sorta do the same for my nieces but I can't get them a car, they also ride so I could get them tack or what ever is needed. She's a good kid and much better than ones I know.
         
        03-18-2012, 04:52 AM
      #3
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by VT Trail Trotters    
    Firebird, you should like a great bro I must say. And im 16 in like 2 weeks myself O.o ha ha, but ill try to help you. From what you say about her she's a very well rounded kid, A's in school, community service, and 2.5 GPA. And great she will get 2 years free of community college!! You sound like your very close with her, and I wish I was with my siblings who are much older but 10 and little over 20 years for the other 2. But im going to by my own vehicle for under 2k, but I think if your willing to get her the car she deserves it. Id sorta do the same for my nieces but I can't get them a car, they also ride so I could get them tack or what ever is needed. She's a good kid and much better than ones I know.
    thanks! Yea we're really close. That's great that your going to buy your own vehicle. That's what I did and I was so proud of that truck even though it was beat up and rusty. I really believe that its best for a kid to buy their own. She has around 2500 saved up. Its just so much harder for a girl to get a job. I was thinking about having her pay 1000 so she still feels like she worked for it. And I want her to have something I can trust. With her being a girl, I worry about her getting stranded somewhere. And the way she has takin care of my truck, she's shown me that she's capable of taking care of a vehicle
         
        03-18-2012, 04:59 AM
      #4
    Started
    Your welcome, off topic but your a few years younger than my sis and we sadly havent talked in 4 YEARS! And I can't get her to talk for what ever reason, but you need family. My niece who I talk to now often is a few years younger than me and we get along great, she's a sweet girl too. Awesome she's got a good amount of money saved up, and that can be true. If you do make her pay for part it could and it may mean more to her if you did. In the case if it was me it would. Yeah unless she knows advance auto stuff you don't want her in a truck that got like 200,000+ miles on it that's iffy for a time till you figure out if theres anything wrong with it. She takes care of your truck as well as you make it sound you should trust her with the car.
         
        03-18-2012, 05:11 AM
      #5
    Super Moderator
    If you decide to buy her a car, it should be understood that it's a one time deal, will not be replaced and she should not expect huge gifts next time.
    Personally, I would not buy a 16 year old a car, period. But, I realize there are circumstances that require a 16 year old to have their own transportation.
    My son turns 16 in two days. He will not be getting a car. Maybe, if he pays half ,. At 17, and has a job to pay for his own insurance.

    In any case, if I were you I would buy a car that is very reliable and will not have a lot of repairs. I don't know about Cadillac, but a Toyota or Subura are the car I find has less repair needs.
         
        03-18-2012, 05:28 AM
      #6
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by tinyliny    
    If you decide to buy her a car, it should be understood that it's a one time deal, will not be replaced and she should not expect huge gifts next time.
    yea that's definitely understood lol!! She unfortunately is not used to getting a whole lot, so she knows that she wont get another one.

    Its definitely ideal for a kid to save up and buy their own. But she goes to an elementary school after school to volunteer with an after school daycare type deal for her community service. I've been at doctor appointments with my ankle, and by the time I can pick her up, its an hour late. So when im back working, I know that will be tough to time right. And I wont be able to take her and pick her up from work when she has a job.

    Another reason to the whole deal, is I don't want her working too much to save money for a car, and work on top of her getting her community service, I don't want her grades to suffer. She spends a lot of time on schoolwork. Her grades are going to have a lot to do with her getting into college. So its also understood that if her grades start dropping, the keys will be taken
         
        03-18-2012, 05:31 AM
      #7
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by VT Trail Trotters    
    Your welcome, off topic but your a few years younger than my sis and we sadly havent talked in 4 YEARS! And I can't get her to talk for what ever reason, but you need family. My niece who I talk to now often is a few years younger than me and we get along great, she's a sweet girl too. Awesome she's got a good amount of money saved up, and that can be true. If you do make her pay for part it could and it may mean more to her if you did. In the case if it was me it would. Yeah unless she knows advance auto stuff you don't want her in a truck that got like 200,000+ miles on it that's iffy for a time till you figure out if theres anything wrong with it. She takes care of your truck as well as you make it sound you should trust her with the car.
    yea family is big. I hope you guys can work things out someday. Its always sad when family can't get along
         
        03-18-2012, 05:36 AM
      #8
    Started
    It is, we all get along well. And its not me and my sis don't get along thank god its she wont talk to me.... I don't have her number or anything so im on Facebook and she is and I send her messages and post on her wall and she's always on there at some point but never responds!!! And to your response above... and guessing she's in the same grade im in and school is very important and working on finding possible colleges soon and career paths etc. but you REALLY don't want her grades to suffer and drop. Having all A's gives her a great change to getting into a college she wants to.
         
        03-18-2012, 05:45 AM
      #9
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by VT Trail Trotters    
    It is, we all get along well. And its not me and my sis don't get along thank god its she wont talk to me.... I don't have her number or anything so im on Facebook and she is and I send her messages and post on her wall and she's always on there at some point but never responds!!! And to your response above... and guessing she's in the same grade im in and school is very important and working on finding possible colleges soon and career paths etc. but you REALLY don't want her grades to suffer and drop. Having all A's gives her a great change to getting into a college she wants to.
    shes a sophomore. Yea I was talking with her councelor about her community service hours making sure she was on track to get what she needs and we were talking about colleges. She causually told me what tuition is to some universities and my jaw about hit the floor. I didnt go to college, I had NO IDEA!
         
        03-18-2012, 05:48 AM
      #10
    Started
    Ok im one too and though she would be, since she's 15 turning 16 soon. Oh and college tuition... I looked at I for a college I was looking at, umm yeah I don't know what happened but I was like WHATTTTT and then NOOO WAYYY! But community college is much cheaper and some careers you don't need 4 years of college so it all depends.
         

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