Thanks you guys, Its been a very rough couple of days.
I am distracting myself at a show my strainer is at for the weekend and its back to work Sunday morning to continue getting through this. I just can't sit alone for to long.
My sister called today and asked me what type of pendant I wanted for my necklace that will have a pinch of dad's ashes in them so I will have him with me the rest of my life.
I found out a little bit ago that my trainer's husband who was going to go with and support me wont be able to make it to the funeral next Friday. I am 99% sure my amazing supportive god send of a boyfriend will be there to take me and support me and have my best friend go as well. My mom and god mother will be there to. It hit me hard and hurt so bad when he said he couldn't make. Something about knowing he was going to be there made me feel better about it.
I'm still in a fog and its a day my day process.
I want to make a difference somehow...I don't know how but I do.
Just so out of it, angry, sad,lost....everything all at once.