Relationship advise needed ! :( - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 17 Old 09-08-2013, 05:07 PM
Join Date: Jul 2011
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Someone trying to guilt trip you into staying in a relationship with all this "you don't love me" nonsense.. not worth it.

You know you're unhappy. There is a reason for it. Figure it out and decide if it's fixable or you're better off single.

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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post #12 of 17 Old 09-08-2013, 05:28 PM
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Breaking up is hard to do. But sometimes it the best thing for ya. Don't let him lay a guilt trip on ya. If ya no longer want to be in the relationship, let him know, and tell him its over.
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post #13 of 17 Old 09-08-2013, 07:21 PM
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It's not fair to yourself to stay in that relationship. It's not fair to him, either. He's going to see that you're not happy, and it's going to make him miserable. Yes, he'll be crushed for a while, but he deserves to find somebody who does love him and they can make each other happy - you shouldn't have to stick with a relationship because you think it's best for him. That's not how a relationship should work.
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post #14 of 17 Old 09-08-2013, 07:36 PM
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End it.
Sounds like he is starting to act possessive and taking you on some guilt trips along the way. If he really loved you he wouldn't try to make you feel worse.

As for the boy at work, be careful. He is your coworker and as another member has stated, you can both be fired for flirting/dating.
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post #15 of 17 Old 09-08-2013, 09:59 PM
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As for not wanting to hurt him, to be honest, I think you really are afraid of hurting yourself. He's going to be hurt whether you end it now or later. you want it to be easy, and no backlash against you from a hurt person. You want him to be "ok", or even "happy " about it. That's not fair to him. YOu want to put the burden of the decision off of yourself and have it be some kind of mutual agreement, , but since it is YOU who wants the relationship to end, you must take the emotional repurcussions, and do not blame him for being unhappy about YOUR decision. Respect that, apologize and move on.
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post #16 of 17 Old 09-09-2013, 11:25 PM
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ok I get hurting people sucks BUT both you are gonna get hurt more if you don't make a decision. Either you're in or you're out, if you don't want to be in this relation ship anymore don't be. Simple. You don't "ask for a break up" if you wanna break up you break up.

Equestrianism; 10% luck, 20% skill, 15% concentrated power of will, 5% pleasure, 50% pain and 100% reason to remember you're absolutely insane to be riding a beast that big.
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post #17 of 17 Old 09-09-2013, 11:58 PM
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Relationships require work and commitment from both parties. You could conceivably work this relationship out and both of you would be happy again. Right now you're feeling the natural ebb and flow that is normal throughout the course of any relationship, it's just life. If you're ready to commit and he is a good man with whom you share similar values and goals in life and who you once had that crazy passionate spark for then I say stick it out and give it a chance. It'll require you being completely honest with him AND him being adult enough to work through it instead of just pulling out the "you don't love me" card. You'll have to be an adult about it all as well.

Love is as much about choices as the rest of life.
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