As for not wanting to hurt him, to be honest, I think you really are afraid of hurting yourself. He's going to be hurt whether you end it now or later. You want it to be easy, and no backlash against you from a hurt person. You want him to be "ok", or even "happy " about it. That's not fair to him. YOu want to put the burden of the decision off of yourself and have it be some kind of mutual agreement, , but since it is YOU who wants the relationship to end, you must take the emotional repurcussions, and do not blame him for being unhappy about YOUR decision. Respect that, apologize and move on.