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post #1 of 19 Old 05-07-2012, 10:29 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: In my own little world;)
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Since I obviously can't say anything on facebook...

Today has just been one of those days:(

1. Both kids at the barn so 2x longer to do stalls.

2. Go out to get daughters lesson horse, BO's 2yr old "project" decided he wanted to go along and as I'm closing the gate he rushes me & bends my elbow backwards. Then starts running out to the cows. Finally catch him & put him in his stall.

3. BO gets on daughters case for not having horse ready. (she's waiting for me to put the saddle on, my arm was still goofy)

4. Get's on my case for the 2yr old being in his stall. I told her it was him in stall or a loose horse. She comments "well he never gives me problems".

5. Finally decided to listen to all of you & try a rope halter on Dally (that'll be a dif post, it worked pretty well!). Didn't go over well w/ barn owner.

6. Finally get home, & tell daughter to finish homework (she started it on the way out to the barn & on the way back. Hubby isn't happy homework wasn't completely done.

7. Check email & find out my MIL is staying w/ us for 4 days. She heard hubby's siblings were having a grilling weekend to "celebrate" the May b-days at our house. Basically, it's an excuse to get plastered & gossip @ the rest of the fam. Not only did she invite herself, but cancelled my sons daycare for one of the days to spend time w/ him, but we still have to pay daycare. And I have no idea where she's going to sleep! I told hubby we'll get her a hotel room & she can take the kids. He said no!

Grrrr, I'd say I'm just going to stay at the barn, but right now it's a horse a piece.
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post #2 of 19 Old 05-07-2012, 10:35 PM
Join Date: Apr 2012
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I'm sorry. :( *hugs*
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post #3 of 19 Old 05-07-2012, 11:07 PM
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Missouri
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That sounds like a really stressful day.. honestly I would be upset too if someone came over unannounced and kind of messed with my plans. I hope you figure it out with your hubby and it turns out to be a good week for you.

She really should have talked to you before cancelling daycare.. that wasn't fair on you guys at all.

As for your BO, your safety is important and everyone runs late once in awhile.. it's life and it's unpredictable. I hope your arm is feeling okay, it stung me just reading about it!

Big hugs, try to be as positive as you can about this whole thing.. it's hard but it feels better than focusing on all the negatives
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post #4 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 03:07 AM
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Personaly i'dhave been no where near as polite as you to the YO.

i'd have also told the MIL that if she wanted to come over then she needs to get a hotel as you were not expecting her and will not be put out by her. i'd also tell her that i was not happy about her changing your plans without consulting you and she should pay for the day care.
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post #5 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 03:23 AM
Join Date: Dec 2011
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I agree with Faye. MIL should pay for the day care if since she cancelled it without your permission and should stay in a hotel if she comes at all (personally I'd try to talk the husband into telling her she couldn't come, she wasn't invited. Simple. I'd probably do the same to my mum.) you weren't prepared for her and shouldn't be expected to put up with that.
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post #6 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 07:38 AM
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: South Portland, Maine, USA
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"but we still have to pay daycare" ok I kinda feel annoyed at that..... She cancelled daycare for that day YOU should not pay period. My child care will not charge for the day if we can't have Chris over. Due to her appointments to weather or what ever!
If she wants to get paid for it I would find another one because that's just taking the mick.
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post #7 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 08:16 AM
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Fayetteville, Arkansas
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I feel for you on the MIL stuff. My husband is getting lasik eye surgery done and she insists on staying with us for two days afterwards to take care of him(The surgery recovery time is half a day). Mother in laws in the house is a bad time.
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post #8 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 09:25 AM
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Originally Posted by northwesten View Post
"but we still have to pay daycare" ok I kinda feel annoyed at that..... She cancelled daycare for that day YOU should not pay period. My child care will not charge for the day if we can't have Chris over. Due to her appointments to weather or what ever!
If she wants to get paid for it I would find another one because that's just taking the mick.
Northwesten, not sure about where you live, but here daycares are run like a business. If you decide not to bring your child on a scheduled day, then you pay. Why should they be out the money because you chose not to bring the child ? Daycare's also are paid for vacations, which I DO NOT agree with. They are a service business, and if not open for the service, nor should they be paid. Costs twice as much if the parent doesn't take that same week off, as they have to pay for the daycare on vacation, plus a daycare to watch said child so parent can work. Not fair!

To the OP, WOW! I think I'd blow a gasket, not only the the BO (obviously having a bad day, but directed it at you), but the MIL overstepped her bounds. And what's up with your daycare? Why would they allow her to cancel, she is not a primary parent? Around here, you have to be on the list to pick up the child, and if canceling anything, parents only have that authority.

Don't roll out the welcome mat for MIL, let her feel like an imposition. After all, YOU didn't invite her. Plus, call daycare and let them know that she is NEVER to do something like that again and that the child WILL be there as scheduled.

Now, have a nice chat, LOUDLY if needed, with your darling husband. The woman he needs to stand by is you. The woman whose emotions he needs to concern himself is you. I think that's what those pesky VOWs were all about. Perhaps a refresher of them is in order?

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post #9 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 09:38 AM Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: In my own little world;)
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Our Daycare is out of a house, but she's licenced. I don't have a problem paying her for a few vacation days (she only takes 5 days a year, and allows herself 3 sick days w/o having to refund) but it's all in her contract. She takes amazing care of our son!! She doesn't charge overtime, she asked us not to bring lunches for him since she uses him to eat all her family's dinner leftovers, LOL. And if I'm running late, she NEVER makes a big deal about him being around after hours (she gets around licensing by saying one of her daughters in babysitting).

As far as MIL calling daycare, I was told this morning by daycare that MIL was told daycare would have to check with me first. She also has one of "those" MIL's :)

Hubby got an earful on the phone this morning!!

Thanks guys for listening!! You're the best
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post #10 of 19 Old 05-08-2012, 10:33 AM
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Ugh, some MIL's are horrid beasts. At least yours wants to spend time with your son.
My kid asked to spend the night with mine the other day and her response? "Well, I guess..." I DID speak up and said " A NICE yes or no would be NICE, dontcha think!?!" Evil doer! She ignored me. But Saturday she ACTUALLY came over to pick up my kid so Hub and I could ride, usually we have to meet her at the bottom of the hill because she refuses to drive the two miles of NICE road to our house. Then she said "I need some eggs." Not please, not may I, not here have a five for the two 18 pack cartons, NADDA! The rest of my family pays a measly $2 for a dozen they LOVE having organic, free range eggs and MIL normally pays over $4 a dozen for her fancy store eggs and I know because she gives me her old cartons! HELLO, organic chicken feed ain't cheap! EVIL, I tell ya! Oh, sorry to rant!

Can't believe your MIL called DC without your knowing! That is INSANE.
Is she going to a hotel or are you going to have to put a kid on the couch? I would go slightly NUTS if mine stayed over! LOL!
I have to be careful griping about mine to Hub because he talks to her about it and then she makes snippy comments defending herself to me without actually bringing up the topic, like I wouldn't know who her source was or what she is refering to!

Arg, hang in there.

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