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Spanking debate article.

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#1 ·
Just some food for thought...this was posted this morning on yahoo.ca and it reminded me of the spaking debate thread. There are links to some interesting evidence based research. Thought some of you may be interested. I'm sure there are studies out there that suggest that spanking is a positive form of discipline, so if you know of any please post them! The idea of posting this is not to disparage anyones parenting choices, just to inspire some fresh thoughts both for and against spanking.


The great spanking debate is back on (as if debate over North America's most controversial discipline method ever took a time out). The publication in the medical journal Pediatrics of what is being heralded as the most powerful proof to date that spanking leads to aggressive behavior has reignited the spanking debate both on- and off-line.
The journal states that "children who are spanked frequently at age 3 are more likely to be aggressive when they're 5, even when you account for possible confounding factors," according to a study.
Of course, this study is just the latest in a long line of studies to give spanking the thumbs down. Two studies conducted by researchers at Duke University, Oklahoma State University, the University of Pittsburgh, Auburn University, and Indiana University and published in the September/October 2009 issue of Child Development concluded that when parents use physical discipline throughout childhood, their children experience more behaviour problems during adolescence. And then there was this study linking spanking to a lower IQ.
And good old-fashioned common sense also argues against spanking as anything approaching an effective discipline tool. Discipline is, after all, supposed to be about teaching. Hitting someone doesn't teach a child anything at all. If using pain and fear were an effective method of teaching, our computers would be wired with electric shocks to zap us each time we made a typo, the theory being that we'd the fear of being zapped would motivate us to improve our typing accuracy overnight. (A more likely outcome would be that we'd abandon our keyboards.)
So how can you tell the difference between an effective discipline method and one that is merely masquerading as such? Here's an excerpt from a handout from one of my recent parenting workshops that tackles this exact question.

You know you've come across a win-win discipline method (a method that works well for both you and your child) if that discipline method....
  • is suited to your child's developmental stage and temperament
  • is compatible with your parenting style
  • is fair and reasonable
  • can be implemented quickly and easily (including when you're out-and-about with your child)
  • is designed to help your child learn to make better decisions in the future (as opposed to merely punishing your child for the current incident of misbehaviour)
  • promotes and models respect by treating your child with respect (as opposed to embarrassing, humiliating, or degrading your child)
  • encourages the desired behaviour while making the undesirable behaviour less appealing
  • leaves your child feeling good about himself and you feeling good about yourself as a parent; and builds upon the parent-child bond.
You don't have to be a scientist (rocket or otherwise) to see that spanking simply doesn't measure up.
So what's your take? Do you think spanking is passé? Should we be treating it as a thing of the past and moving on to other discipline methods? How do you react when other people spank their kids in front of you? Or, if you're the one doing the spanking, are people more inclined to say something to you if you're spanking your kids these days (as compared to a few years ago)?
 
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#2 ·
There was an arguement on the radio and parents were talking about how spanking was so bad and that it shouldnt be done, and that they should judt take away their blanky, or special teddy bear or something. And really and truly, i think taking away a childs 'blanky' for even a night is crueler then spanking, My little cousin was so attached to his Blanky (or teddy bar, or toy, whatever they have) that he couldnt sleep without it.

I think at a certain age, spanking works well. and for punishing in public, maybe it will happen once? but after that they know that they dont like it to happen in public so they are good.

Im only 14, and have just be observing all this because of my little cousin and little kids, haha. And most of the adults i know turned out ok, except for a few... haha
 
#3 ·
There was an arguement on the radio and parents were talking about how spanking was so bad and that it shouldnt be done, and that they should judt take away their blanky, or special teddy bear or something. And really and truly, i think taking away a childs 'blanky' for even a night is crueler then spanking, My little cousin was so attached to his Blanky (or teddy bar, or toy, whatever they have) that he couldnt sleep without it.
I agree, taking away a "blanky" or whatever is far more cruel, and has more long reaching cause and effect in terms of emotional trauma, than spanking ever would. My son, who is six, has a "blanky" of sorts, a dingy, horrible, scrap of yellow blanket with a stuffed toy duck head on in named "Aflac". This thing is my son's coping mechanism. He's had it since birth, he shunned all pacifiers in favor of sucking on Aflac's wing. Aflac has had innumerable washings, bleachings, and re-stitchings over the last 6 years, and my son is still not at an emotional level to be without it. Whenever he is upset or scared, first thing he goes for is Aflac. It's all about security for him, and to advocate replacing a 2 second, over and done with and full forgiveness achieved punishment by instead removing a child's source of security, and claiming that is less traumatic for the child, is about as backwards thinking as I can imagine. I'm not a huge advocate of spanking, it's not not my first or best method of discipline. Before I had children I always swore I would never spank. But I have found there IS a time and place for spanking, particularly when a strong negative association needs made (like running towards a road).
 
#6 · (Edited)
That's an interesting article, thanks for sharing!

My thoughts about spanking are a bit contradictory. On the one hand I see it as a quick, effective and especially unquestionable punishment (you know, nothing like "oh dear little honey could you take those toys away and I'll buy you ice cream... You won't? Oh, it's okay, mommy will do it) which will teach your kid how to respect your authority. Still, on the other hand I think it can also teach wrong values about hitting people weaker than you and I don't know if it's ok to use physical force toward someone so much weaker than you. I can just imagine since I don't have children yet, but personally a vision about myself hitting my children feels disgusting. I could also repeat it's officially illegal here. Don't still catch that I wouldn't limit my children, I'm absolutely not a fan of "free parenting". I would just try to find other ways to limit them.

I think taking away a blanky, if the child is really attached to it, like can't just sleep without it etc, is mental violence. Of course I can't know anything about parenting since like I said, I don't have kids yet but I've heard of penalty periods, taking away some benefits (my favorite is taking away a door from a rebellious teenager :twisted:) or then grounding etc. I'd start trying something like that and then if it didn't work, something else. I think spanking wouldn't still be the first choice in my list. But well, perhaps we will see my way some day.

I think I've myself become spanked perhaps once. I also think I wouldn't interfere if I saw someone spanking her/his child except if it was a clear assault.
 
#7 ·
About the taking away a "blankie" or other comfort item - removing a comfort Item or spanking are not the only two discipline methods available. There are LOTS of other ways of handling discilpine. My personal opinion is very anti-spanking for a miriad of reasons that I have gone into in the previous thread about the same topic. The evidence based research linked in the OP article about aggresion later in the childs deveopment is quite striking. An interesting read. I love evidence based research as it is truely an un-biased way to glean information. I was never spanked, and am anti-spanking. Intersting that many people who did receive spankings are pro-spanking...
 
#9 ·
I love evidence based research as it is truely an un-biased way to glean information. I was never spanked, and am anti-spanking. Intersting that many people who did receive spankings are pro-spanking...
The only way that it would be un-biased was if the researchers didn't have an outcome in mind. Unfortunately, with much of the research done today an outcome is first established to gain funding then evidence supporting the outcome is gathered and evidence to the contrary is dismissed or ignored. It may not happen in every case but it happens often enough that I would not call it truely un-biased.
 
#8 ·
I really could care less if my five year old is aggressive. I am not raising 5 yos. I am raising men and I choose to raise them with clear consequences. I will not torture my kids with guilt or mind games. If they are disobeying they will get one warning and maybe even two warnings with the consequences spelled out for them. If the undesirable behavior continues then the punishment is carried out. It may not be spanking but many times spanking is the most immediate and simplest method. If you are shopping or walking somewhere you can't have a timeout but you can give a discreet spanking that will correct the behavior. I have never made a mark on my child but they know that if I threaten a spanking (or any punishment) I will follow through.
 
#10 ·
Why is it that the thinking is that if you don't spank, you have to use "guilt and mindgames"? There are alternatives. And to me, and aggressive 5 year old IS a problem. When does the aggression start to become a problem otherwise? 6 years, 10 years? How can you cure aggression whn you have TAUGHT the behaviour?
The research projects that I am actively involved with at McMaster university I believe to be very unbiased. The child emotion and development lab findings are what spark new, more specific research endeavours, such as the end-results of different methods of discipline. While hyper-parenting your child is most likely not a great option either, I have a hard time believing that hitting a person weaker than myself is teaching a good lesson. I too, am raising a man and I want that man have in his heart the belief that it is never OK to hit someone weaker than themselves. What about daughters? Is it NOT ok to hit girls, but boys get whacked?
I guess I'm just curious - most parents in the USA are pro-spanking, so I was just wondering if there have been any studies to change my anti-spanking sensibilities? I'd truely love to read some, as a thinking parent who just wants the absolute best for her little ones.
 
#11 ·
So the result after my long, unclear comment: I think I'm anti-spanking too even it isn't that hot question for me (yet). At least wouldn't spank my kids.
 
#12 ·
I got spanked alot... iv gotten smacked in the face a few times. I deserved it everytime, i was a very bad little girl, yelling didnt work, neither did taking my stuff away. Taking things away from me just caused me to be destructive and break things. Yelling i would just yell back. I would always talk back and be very disrespect full. Untill my dad put me over his knee and whooped me at the age of 12 right infront of 4 of my friends. That ended my bad behavior very quickly.
 
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