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For those of you who have been "bashed" on any threads

This is a discussion on For those of you who have been "bashed" on any threads within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

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        04-15-2014, 05:17 PM
      #11
    Weanling
    And God forbid if you want to pet your horse, give it a treat or otherwise show some sort of affection. I get you have to be a leader and they don't think like humans , but I want to enjoy my horse. Of course in a safe way.
    Posted via Mobile Device
         
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        04-15-2014, 05:18 PM
      #12
    Weanling
    On the flip side, I have seen some very kind people and I'm in awe of their knowledge!
    Posted via Mobile Device
    Remali likes this.
         
        04-15-2014, 05:35 PM
      #13
    Yearling
    To play devils advocate, there are a lot of new horse owners who show up on forums like this, are given advice with the best of intentions, dislike said advice and get their backs up, and then claim that people are being ignorant and rude when those trying to help stand their ground.

    Sometimes the truth hurts, and although I will agree some people can state facts more tactfully than others, it doesn't change the fact that some people feel backed into a corner and "insulted" whenever someone's comment doesn't fit their personal viewpoint of a situation.
    Posted via Mobile Device
         
        04-15-2014, 05:35 PM
      #14
    Weanling
    Honestly, I think that if something somebody says on the internet can get under your skin and offend you, you're not cut out for horses. Maybe I do have thick skin, but nobody here knows me. Unless they are offering real, helpful advice, I ignore the rest. I know I would be a miserable person if I was offended by all of the things I read that irk me on the internet, so I choose not to let it bother me. I think people forget that getting offended is just as much a choice as choosing to post something that could be taken the wrong way.
    I appreciate how blunt everyone here is. People that do know us and our situations tend to sugar coat it. The advice here is objective, and what you receive depends on the quality of your explanation of the situation. If you don't feel like what your getting is applicable, either brush it off and move to the next post or try to explain yourself better.
    Endiku, boots, SullysRider and 1 others like this.
         
        04-15-2014, 05:50 PM
      #15
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by redrose1    
    I wonder how old you are? Because that's really sad. It is ONLY the internet but do you realize that just because you don't know the other person and it doesn't matter to you how sad that is for the other person on the other end?? I seriously doubt that you wouldn't feel something if someone said you were an idiot on line. That would mean you were not human :(
    I am 66 years old and I do have friends, some of which I met on the 'net. If someone wants to be rude and call me names, they DO NOT matter, whether on the 'net or in real life, and I really don't care a bit about how rude people feel when I ignore them. I have FAMILY that calls me idiot because I have horses. They get no slack when they are rude, so why should a stranger?
    tinyliny and Palomine like this.
         
        04-15-2014, 05:52 PM
      #16
    Trained
    I often get into trouble for things I say, which can at times be very very frustrating, because what I write reads fine to me, and is meant in genuine help or genuine questions, but people choose to get upset by what I say.

    Some of it is age related, some of it is cultural, I see sometimes when UK people 'get' me but others don't.

    Really though, the internet is no different from life, apart from now you are talking to a world wide audience, and here you have mods to protect you. Honestly people, use your own filters, put people who annoy you on ignore, my personal list is ever growing. Realise that some harsh messages are give out of worry about the situation you are in, we have seen so many people getting on a mess, we are trying to stop you making the same mistake.

    Also do remember that no everyone is who they say they are, ad many of us have spent ages online and via pm trying to help a person only to find that you are dealing with a troll, and that is very frustrating.

    In the end, it's the internet, everyone gets to have their say, share their genuine beliefs, and sadly so often things break down because people jump into defend an OP, when no defence is needed, again, let people decide who they listen to, but at least run all the possibilities through your mind.
         
        04-15-2014, 05:57 PM
      #17
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by dkb811    
    And God forbid if you want to pet your horse, give it a treat or otherwise show some sort of affection. I get you have to be a leader and they don't think like humans , but I want to enjoy my horse. Of course in a safe way.
    Posted via Mobile Device
    Someone wanna come tell me I can't hand feed my stallion his carrots and hug his neck. I will laugh you all the way home. It's never been a problem in the years I've owned him because he was raised to be a gentleman in all things and bred to have a sweet disposition. I know my horse well. How well do YOU know him?
    dkb811 likes this.
         
        04-15-2014, 06:14 PM
      #18
    Super Moderator
    We have user names that give us anonymity for a reason, and it has both benefits and drawbacks.
    My experience is that people are generally about as nice on the internet as they are in real life. They might be a tad bit blunter, but if they are generally an empathetic and considerate person in real life, this will show in their posts on a forum, and the converse is true.

    However, if the rudest and cruelest expressions are left un moderated, then they beget a culture of the same. Folks who are not normally aggressive in their approach can be swayed into a meaner aspect by the general tone of the group. That's the ugly part, and as a moderator, that's why we attempt to stop such things from developing from the beginning.

    On the other side (aren't there always a bunch of sides?), people come to pose a question, usually, to get some answers or ideas. If you ask, you need to be realistic in knowing that the answers will reflect a wide spectrum of individual knowledge and tolerance and courtesy. You go fishing, you can't pick and chose what bites.
         
        04-15-2014, 06:32 PM
      #19
    Super Moderator
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by tinyliny    
    We have user names that give us anonymity for a reason, and it has both benefits and drawbacks.
    My experience is that people are generally about as nice on the internet as they are in real life. They might be a tad bit blunter, but if they are generally an empathetic and considerate person in real life, this will show in their posts on a forum, and the converse is true..
    I travelled across to the US to meet up with a group of people I had met in a forum. My late boss' wife was most concerned that I might be meeting with an ax murderer or some other pervert. My boss, just laughed and said that he pitied either if they crossed me!

    The people I met up with were exactly as they were in the forum, I had such a great time and truthfully made great 'real' friends.

    Oh, I did meet with a problem and that was calling them their real names and not their net ones!
    SouthernTrails and boots like this.
         
        04-15-2014, 07:25 PM
      #20
    Super Moderator
    Well, get ready, 'cause one of these days, I plan to come across the Pond and show up on the doorstep of some of our Brit members!
         

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