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tough last couple of days... just having a vent

This is a discussion on tough last couple of days... just having a vent within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

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        08-23-2012, 11:17 AM
      #51
    Trained
    BEP you cannolt make drastic changes to your life overnight.
    You have lived this way for a number of years.
    You now need to change the way you think and live. That takes a lot of courage and dedication.
    Nothing is going to happen overnight.
    Anything worh while takes pallning and time. Shalom
         
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        08-23-2012, 11:18 AM
      #52
    Trained
    Glad to know that I'm not the only one who finds socializing to be exhausting :). My current office job is FAR FAR more tiring than when I was a barn manager for that reason!
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        08-23-2012, 11:27 AM
      #53
    Yearling
    I know it's been said quite often here, but it's worth repeating...Keep looking for a Dr. That will work WITH you, if the one you are currently seeing is only willing to take the paved road, keep looking until you find one that is willing to try gravel paths.

    Like many others here, what you are going through is like looking in the mirror. I'm not going to sugar coat it, because that can make it more frustrating (at least for me), but the ups and downs will probably never go away. BUT they will smooth out eventually, you just have to be stronger than the train wreck.
         
        08-23-2012, 11:42 AM
      #54
    Trained
    Courage, dedication, and money! Rent here is ridiculous, ours is at least $100/week BELOW market value for a suburban FLAT and we are in a house on 10 acres which Mum pays for (she is amazing!! Of course she lives here too lol)... and she is STILL paying $1000/month. A tiny little flat, not even an apartment, is $1400-$1500/month. A proper house is on average anywhere up to $2000/month. Acreage? Forget it, I've seen it as much as $600 PER WEEK.

    I could move to another town if I was to move out, but even then I don't think I would be able to find acreage I can afford on what an 18yo high school dropout can earn... I have a qualification which is equivalent to having graduated high school, but nothing other than that and a bit over a year working in customer service, which I am NEVER going back to. EVER. I couldn't live in suburbia, my dog would go mad... as would I, I like space!

    So, I have to work with what I've got, meaning I can't be rid of the added stress of making sure my brother eats properly, does his share, etc. Mum has had enough, her food is sorted and we are adults now, so it's time we took responsibility for ourselves... the problem is that I'm having to take up the slack of making sure brother eats properly and does house work instead of sitting on the computer all day. It's exhausting! And then I have two horses to look after, both of which have rain rot atm as the new TB brought it in with her and it spread before we knew it was there. One horse needs bulk time spent on her, because she has, erm, issues... and the other gets jealous and so needs bulk time spent on HIM or else he starts beating the TB up.

    Le sigh. Who would have thought that growing up added so many new responsibilities! Honestly I feel like I have somehow time-travelled, one day I was a teenager and then the next BAM adult who has to somehow get a fellow adult to eat foods he doesn't like and do cleaning/housework... so THIS is what it's like to be married! Hahahahahahahahahaha
         
        08-23-2012, 12:14 PM
      #55
    Trained
    BEP it is not called time travel its called life.
    Think its bad now if you move out it will only increase the problems.
    Find some help for your brother.
    Can't the State or federal government not help? Shalom
         
        08-23-2012, 12:27 PM
      #56
    Trained
    Financially, yeah, looking after my brother though? If I moved out (arhhmmm, away from him) I wouldn't have to. More house work for me, and most likely more spending on food because it's really expensive to live alone, but god maybe I wouldn't have to work so hard every bloody day on stressful things... money doesn't really stress me out that much, I have enough to live and enough to look after my horses plus a little on the side.

    Our govt is pretty useless tbh, they're the ones that screwed him up so bad in the first place. He WAS fine, well, not "normal" but functioning just fine tyvm and learning to look after himself (ie cook, clean, look after pets - he has always self-cared in getting dressed and other personal needs)... and then he went to high school. Stuff that went on with the school caused his huge anxiety issues and when he was in school he was suicidal. THEY had screwed up so bad that we were told by a human rights group to take the education department to court, because we had a very strong case and WOULD win. Perhaps we should have, they turned a very promising young man into a complete shut-in who is incapable of working... who knows how much potential income from work they have cost him?!

    ...anybody see a theme here? Depression and anxiety DEFINITELY run in the family, my mother has had depression, my aunt has panic attacks, my grandfather currently IS depressed (but won't admit it, bloody army men haha!)... nothing against the folks in our family, they're all good people, but our genetics certainly don't seem to help us much.

    It's funny, for the longest time I thought mental illness was something that affected other people. Not me. My idea of mental illness was the lady down the street (manic depressive, which is of course just another name for bipolar, plus goodness knows what she DIDN'T admit to/know about) who would be your best mate one day and then come to you the next, telling you (and completely believing her own words) that an hour ago she saw you walking your dog past her property, and it pooped on her lawn and you didn't pick it up, and she would really appreciate if you would clean up after your dog... when you didn't WALK your dog that day, or the day before that, or the day before THAT, anywhere near her place. She was odd, that one. Lovely, but certainly strange.

    Not really sure what I'm on about, and when I'm confusing myself I know I've stayed up too late :P high time I went to bed I think, have been up since 8am and it's 12.30 the next morning now.
         
        08-24-2012, 05:20 PM
      #57
    Foal
    This might be a shot in the dark, but it could also help you greatly; I just recently read about a test doctors can give called the ALCAT test. It basically tests to see which foods cause negative reactions from your body. It has been proven to help with depression, panic disorders, migraines, diabetes, and many other things including infertility. If there is a Dietician in your area,or if your regular doctor can administer it, it might be worth taking the chance if it could mean making you feel better. :)
         
        08-24-2012, 06:08 PM
      #58
    Trained
    Stepshark she has a form of autism.
    A change of diet may be helpful but it will not replace medication and behaviour modification.
    Her only option is to seek help under a DRs care and supervision. Shalom
         
        08-27-2012, 05:35 AM
      #59
    Trained
    StephShark, I find it very interesting that you mention such a thing, since I already eat wheat free. I went wheat free nearly 9 years ago on a naturopath's advice and within weeks was a totally different person. I now can eat small amounts of wheat, but when I push it too far, I either get depressed or turn bitchy. Yep, it IS a factor.

    There was a lot more detail in what I could and couldn't eat but it was too hard to avoid all of it so for quite some time I went completely gluten free and didn't drink milk... I could have soy milk but that tastes gross so I just avoided it altogether. I drink normal cow's milk now, no problem. Dairy is not and never has been a factor.
         

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