at what point is it considered sexual harassment - Page 2

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at what point is it considered sexual harassment

This is a discussion on at what point is it considered sexual harassment within the General Off Topic Discussion forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category

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    06-22-2013, 08:13 AM
Originally Posted by toto    
Its sexual harassment when they start talking badly to you- the following is stalking!!

Tell them your married. If that don't work call the police! That's scary!
Like being married makes a difference to pervs?

OP I would not suggest saying ANYTHING to them. I would however, make darn sure I got their plate number, pics with the cell phone if possible without them knowing, and call the cops-or, even better, if it is close-call cops while running in the direction of the station! Be super observant at all times-not just when you are running. I would be really careful that they are not following you at other times too. Sometimes if you act like you have no idea they are there (like when they follow you) you can somewhat surprise them if they get too close.....

I only got followed once, and it just happened that I was in an area that I probably should not have been in (sales calls for work at a MD;s office in a horrible neighborhood).....guy followed me to my car in a wide open area. I knew he was following me, walked fast and with purpose to my vehicle, which, at the time did not have auto locks, unfortunately. When I got to the vehicle, it was about 10 ft behind me. I had my keys between my knuckles in case I needed to hit him, turned to him really annoyed looking, and said in a very determined tone (and LOUDLY) "LEAVE ME ALONE. I have work to do." It caught him off guard that I would do that, and actually gave me time to get my key in the door and turn it before he reached for my wrist. As he reached, I pulled away, naturally, and noticed that he had handcuffs hanging from the wrist! I managed to get into my car, lock it and drive off......I was very very lucky. I called the cops immediately and let them know where he was, since either they lost him or someone else did! I went right back to the office and explained to my boss that I no longer considered that my "service" area, and if that was an issue, so be it.
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    06-22-2013, 12:28 PM
Unfortunately, this is getting more common, but that doesn't make it okay at all.

Like others have said, next time you see them and they start making remarks/following you, get a plate number, the make and model of their car, pictures of them (or video) if you can, and call the police. Harassment is a crime and maybe a visit from the cops will be enough to get them to cool it. Even if they don't and something worse happens (to you or someone else), then there will be a record of their harrassing behavior and it will get them a stiffer jail sentence.

Unfortunately, God only gave men enough blood to think with one "head" at a time and young men tend to be more susceptable to gravity pulling the blood down lower. If they are in a group, they can often rile each other up enough to do something that they would not have done if by themselves.

I strongly believe that all women should have some sort of self defense training so that if something happens, they aren't completely unprepared and they actually stand a chance of doing enough to get away from their attacker.
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    06-22-2013, 12:36 PM
Ugh, I hate the fact that girls have to be taught how to defend ourselves against creeps, instead of creeps learning to leave people alone. It's so backwards, but I do think that everyone should know how to defend themselves. Stay alert, stand up for yourself and be ready to run/fight, and if you feel threatened call the cops.
I hate that the world is this way.
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    06-22-2013, 12:39 PM
Green Broke
Its a crying shame that there are still men in this world that will treat some of you women that way.

I have to agree that every person, not just women, who sees themselves as meek should take a basic course to help fend off the minor attacks. Fighting back in a major attack, huge or multiple attackers, may not serve much more purpose than collecting DNA to hopefully convict the perp once/if caught.

Incase you couldn't tell, all my blood is north of the belt line for this posting smrobs...
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    06-22-2013, 12:54 PM
Green Broke
Agreed, video, license plate, and cops.

Also, carry some mace, if they are in range of the mace'um! ... Or maybe some rudimentary water balloons and kool aide...
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    06-22-2013, 01:34 PM
Unfortunately this is the natural behavior of young men. It's no different than male animals puffing themselves up and doing a dance to attract a mate. It takes a proper upbringing by their parents to suppress this kind of behavior. Doesn't help that some women not only expect this kind of behavior but also encourage it.
    06-22-2013, 02:58 PM
Take a cell phone and immediately call the police. Give them the license number or the vehicle, tell them how many boys and what they are saying. Do this every time it happens. I get sick of the male attitude "boys will be boys". Doing it once is one thing, more than once has crossed the line. When your on the line with the police, start yelling (not into the phone) "Stay away from me, Don't come any closer". Put on the hysterics. That should get the police moving.
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    06-22-2013, 03:30 PM
Darrin, I don't agree with you. I don't think it's a 'natural behaviour' and if I were a young man I'd be incredibly offended that people still think that way. The area itself is heavily populated with young men, it's up and coming so there are multiple construction sites, and along the back there are factories and warehouses and they have all been perfectly respectful, it's the people who shouldn't be there at all that are behaving this way.

I think I'm just going to end up bringing my dog with me. I haven't until now because she's too distracted to be a good road walker, and the shoulder getting to the sidewalks is super narrow but while she's the absolute opposite of 'vicious' but she weighs close to 100lbs and will at least encourage them to keep their distance.
    06-22-2013, 03:52 PM
Alex, I'm not condoning the behavior in any way and think it's quite rude. What I do believe is it is what happens when not brought up with properly, ie taught manners/morals.

Why do I say I suspect it's a natural behavior? I've spent a lot of time watching wildlife and males of all species put on some sort of display to attract females.
    06-22-2013, 03:59 PM
Not being brought up 'correctly' is no excuse to completely bypass the accepted norms of society. I would accept that as an excuse for someone raised with no or little human contact at all, but not the situation you are describing. I know many people who were raised in less than ideal situations, they may have 'problems' but none of them would dream of acting the way these young men have. I think we'll just have to agree to disagree on that one.

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