What would you do if you were me? - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 2 Old 03-21-2011, 03:55 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Slovenia
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What would you do if you were me?

Okay, so 3 years ago my mom finally decided that I can get a horse. I was riding for 5 years then. We were looking for a horse and we finally found out, that I liked. He was a huhge gelding, with great personality. I wanted him, but the problem was I didn't have a place to put him. I called in 3 barns, but they were all ful. One said there will be an empty place in June, and it was December then. So we went to ask our neighbours that builed a new stable and had one free place. They lived 500meteres away and I rode there once a week too. (+ the riding school) Well, they said no. I was looking for another place for few months after that, but with no success. The gelding was sold in that time. Mom and me continued to look for a place and for a new horse. Just couldn't find it. We had terrible fights at home, because dad didn't let to build a stable. In March we decided we won't buy a horse. I gave up, and said I'll hope for another chance. 2 minutes after I said that mom's phone rang. Someone called her, selling Candilla. I knew that mare, she was the arrogant beauty in the barn I was riding (she was there for the first year, then they took her to another barn). I knew she will have high price, because she was pure holsteiner, bought from German, jumping, etc... The price was three times higher than a horse we wanted to buy. But... We wanted her. I also knew that my neigbours wanted to buy her when they were buying their horse, but she cost 7 times more than they were ready to pay, because that was in her golden age Well I called our neighbours again. This time they said yes.
I had Candy there for half a year. Every day I went there to clean the stables and to feed the horses.(+the rent). In the begging the owner (girl one year older than me) helped me everyday. In few months once a week. It didn't matter to me. We were riding together, she gave me the advices about horses, because I didn't know much about how to take care of them. She was great. Horses meant the world to her. She was always worried and checking if they are healthy. Every single day. She was calling vet immediatly if something was wrong. When her family went to holidays, I took care of all 3 horses. I also got paid for it. When we move Candy to our place, everybody cried. We were still best friends. We rode together everyday, drive together in school... In few months everything changed. I barely talk to her, she never had time. She rode maybe once a week. That lasted for few months, until the holidays began. Then we were best friends again. And when the school was in for few months, again the same story. Not a word from her and we were driving home and in school together!
In between, she had her moments like: we will live together when we'll go to the college, and I don't know how I would do it without you... You could say I was pretty annoyed by now. Be friend, or don't. Not sometimes. When the summer holidays began we were obviously friends again. But... There was me taking care of her horses for the week, when she was on the holidays and... she forgot my birthday! I was mad... She was very sorry after that and she organized a surprise birthday party for me. We were good again. But when the school started, she again wasn't nowhere near me or her horses. She too, "forget" few times, that I finish my class the same time she did and drove away without me. That brake my nerves. I yelled at her through the phone and that was it. I didn't spoke with her again. She send some messages in few weeks, but I was done with her. Now we don't speak about nothing but when the farrier will come. It's been half a year. Her gelding get ill in between. She didn't call vet for 2 month, then she did but it didn't helped a lot, because that vet is bad. Now her family decided to just leave him like that, without any medications. (he has COPD) Because they don't have money. But they do buy new 200$ jeans every month.
I feel better without her, but:
I lose the round pen (I have place to ride at home, but not to lunge).
I don't have anybody to go for a walk with me.
I'm not taking care of her horses in the holidays anymore and I don't get paid.
I don't have a riding buddy and it's pretty scarry to go riding alone far far away.

So I just wanted to tell that to someone. Have to go to study History now (), maybe I'll add something later...



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post #2 of 2 Old 03-21-2011, 04:08 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: SE Finland
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Sometimes friendly relations can unwind, that's pretty typical especially around your teen years. I remember also I got jealous when my best friend had other companionship or if she didn't pay me attention as much as earlier... See it that way, she has tried, she even organized a surprise party for you.

I'd reach my arm again toward her and start to warm the old frienship again. May just call her sometime, or send some short message? If things like that happen in future (you feel that there's something wrong with your friendship), may you should talk with her over your worries.

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona - Varjo seuraa onneain

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