Tried to create a fairytale - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 13 Old 07-24-2011, 08:16 PM Thread Starter
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Tried to create a fairytale

So, I've always kinda been into writing and have written all kind of unofficial stuff till these days; poems, causeries, even an over 100 A4 pages novel. This is still the first time when I tried to create a fairytale (yes, for children ).

I've already lost that spontaneous imagination that most of children have and caught that it'd have been useful in that thing. Creating fairytales isn't that easy when you're an adult . Maybe I still managed to have some kind of touch with my inner child since IMO it finally turned out to be all ok.

Enjoy!


"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona Oy - Varjo seuraa onneain

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post #2 of 13 Old 07-25-2011, 03:49 PM Thread Starter
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Nah... any feedback?

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona Oy - Varjo seuraa onneain

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post #3 of 13 Old 07-25-2011, 04:50 PM
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Can't watch videos, sorry, it messes up my broadband usage limit! :(

"Did I not just use the word 'puzzling'?"

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post #4 of 13 Old 07-25-2011, 05:13 PM
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I thought it was adorable! Utterly adorable. If you like, and won't be insulted, please send me the entire text and I can make the few minor corrections to the English that will make it flow most naturally.
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post #5 of 13 Old 07-25-2011, 05:41 PM Thread Starter
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Sure I'm not insulted even I think that I'll keep my little flaws.. (I'm fine with it that my non-English background is visible in my works unless it turns too unnatural or hard to understand + it all is a series of changing pictures and the text have been written right into pictures with a photoshop program). Thank you for your offering tho, if there's some very visible thing which keeps repeating, feel free to comment so I can avoid it in future or might re-make the video. Anyways, I might would create something like that again.

Thank you for feedback .

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona Oy - Varjo seuraa onneain


Last edited by TaMMa89; 07-25-2011 at 05:45 PM.
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post #6 of 13 Old 07-26-2011, 01:35 AM
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Yes, there is a certain charm to it as is. I would have to look at again to see if there was any part that really required correction, but I think not.
So, there will be changing pictures, too? Should be fun.
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post #7 of 13 Old 07-26-2011, 01:16 PM
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Could you send me the text, so I can read it? please


"Did I not just use the word 'puzzling'?"

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post #8 of 13 Old 07-26-2011, 04:50 PM Thread Starter
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Oh, unluckily I don't have the text anywhere else but written in that video. The text has also written for the video so it itself would be very lacking if you read just as a plain text.

Since seems that more people want the text, I can consider if I write it here when I have more time some day.

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona Oy - Varjo seuraa onneain


Last edited by TaMMa89; 07-26-2011 at 04:56 PM.
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post #9 of 13 Old 08-06-2011, 11:15 AM
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I thought it was very cute! It reminded me a little bit of the Velveteen Rabbit, but in a good way! =)

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post #10 of 13 Old 08-06-2011, 11:55 AM
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Very cute, thanks for sharing!
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