If you aren't confident in your farrier's work - then you need a new farrier.
My farrier is able to explain the mechanics of every trim to me, how he is shoeing, etc.. If anyone ever questions his work on my horse I can explain to them exactly what he is doing and why. If your friends are asking you about a long toe and you don't know the reason for it then ask your farrier and if you don't get an explanation, call someone else.
I do also agree that a lot of horses need a shorter trim cycle than they are allotted. My horses are on a 4-5 week schedule year round. This might be another thing to discuss with your farrier and your new farrier.
They say money doesn't buy happiness -- well happiness doesn't buy horses!