Ok, I got a minute. that painting is one of the first commissions I did on HF. Still one of my favorite pieces.
Over time, I tend to get tighter and tighter and tighter, and I dont' mean this in a good way. I started out painting really loose and "fresh". And that's what was what was "my" style. over time, I got so wrapped up in getting the details just right, that I now struggle to keep the "feel" of a drawing.
but, this is not meant to be a critique of ME. why I mentioned it is that I see a really nice freshness and freedom to your style that I personally find very appealing, and I had at one time and hope I wont' entirely loose over time.
You aren't desperately worried about exact accuracie. you are ok with drawing a line that's a little wobbly, and drawing a correcting line right over the old one and letting them both exist in the same space. and you use line that is in a variety of motions; some horizontal, some vertical, some heavy, some squiggly. your drawings look like they are just caught in a moment of action; freeze framed, instead of having been created in a solid , stolid stillness, as if they were a statue. Get what I mean? I even like the way you have the writing going around the edges and are not overly concerned that it's all perfect and squared up.
I would suggest that you do take care about how the writing sits in the blank space around the main figure. You don't wnt to take up all the blank space. White area is important. So, don't have your white space all used in a very even way; use some for lettering and leave some to balance all the activity of the drawing. AND, good lettering is essential. I am very bad at lettering, so in the few cases where I have had it in a drawing I have asked my friend , who does caligraphy, to do it for me. If you do it, even if the style is "squiggly" do it well, conisistent sizes and spacing and lined up well. If it isn't , then it must look like its' INTENTIONALLY done this way and not just you being lazy or sloppy.
Teh way you did the hands on the last one, the girl, is perfect! not too much, not too little. this is why I think you have some talent. Hands are hard to do.