Bartering services with another boarder

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Bartering services with another boarder

This is a discussion on Bartering services with another boarder within the Horse Boarding forums, part of the Barns, Boarding, and Farms category

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        12-01-2011, 07:52 PM
    Green Broke
    Angry Bartering services with another boarder

    I currently board at a "self serve" facility. They will feed in the morning if you measure and prepare all your feed and leave it in front of your stall, and that's about it.

    Last summer a friend/co-boarder (who is extremely busy with her career) worked out a deal where I take care of her 2 horses 2 days a week and she takes care of Cinny, 3 days a week. Basically the deal was that in the mornings, every morning when she comes out to turn out her 2 boys, she would turn out Cin. Then whomever's turn it is to take care of them that evening would bring them in, mucks stall, feed, pick hooves etc.

    Everything has been going fine, Cin got turned out every day and then Sun-Tue mucked and fed. Then Wed & Thur I would muck her two stalls/runs and feed her horses. And the other days we took care of just our own, with the exception that she still turned out Cin. Sometimes she would ask me to do extra days on weekends and if my baby got sick or something she would do Cin extra days.

    Well, NOW, she also worked out another deal to take care of another ladie's horse in the evenings. So this means that Wed & Thur night, I take care of this new horse (I wasn't asked first by it's owner or my friend, she just assumed I'd take care of her too). So now 2 days a week I bring in, muck, and feed 3 horses instead of just my friend's 2. On top of that, their deal is that this new lady would turn out my friend's horses in the AM so my friend doesn't do it anymore. But, this person doesn't/won't turn out Cin, so Cin no longer gets daily turnout because of this even though I'm bringing HER horse in and feeding/mucking it 2 nights a week along with my friend's horses.

    I'm not sure how to handle this, how to approach my friend about it, I think it's really unfair to dump an extra horse on me that I didn't bargain for and then get Cin's turnout stopped. I'm afraid she will get mad and say to forget the deal altogether, and I really can't do that as I only have babysitter certain days a week and I don't think the stable is a place for a toddler.

    Does anybody have any suggestions at all how to handle this, or approach this? Cinny is going berzerk now that he's not getting his turnouts and is becoming a little unmanageable on rides. I just don't know what to say, or how to start off the conversation and I don't really want to make waves, but I feel a little taken advantage of right now. All I want is for my horse to get turned out too, he leads well, has decent ground manners and it takes a whole extra 60 seconds to walk him from his stall to the turnout, if that.
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        12-01-2011, 08:05 PM
    Yea, looks like you're getting the sh(*&y end of the deal on this. I would have a good talk with your friend & show her the unfairness. If she has any conscience, she won't want to screw you like this.
        12-01-2011, 09:24 PM
    Green Broke
    So somebody else makes a deal to barter your labor, and you get less in return and you don't know how to handle it ? Seriously ? It's called standing up for yourself and not being a doormat
        12-01-2011, 11:01 PM
    Agree with Joe. Stop being a doormat. While you are letting this woman dump on you, your horse suffers....

    In my world, these things are scratch my back, I scratch yours.....

    There is no way on God's green earth I would lift a finger to help this woman with her horse while my horse stays caged because she can't or won't turn him out for some reason.

    As for how to approach the straightforward. Spell it out in plain and simple language. Don't dilly dally or beat around the bush. Tell her what you are willing to do for her, and be very clear that this is what you expect in return.....else, no deal.
    ChristineNJ likes this.
        12-01-2011, 11:06 PM
    My feeling is, if you wanted someone else to take care of your horse you shouldn't have boarded at a self serve facility.
    Alwaysbehind likes this.
        12-02-2011, 03:48 AM
    Why did you ever start taking care of this 3rd horse? Did you friend speficially ask you to do so or did you just assume that you would need to take on this new responsibility? If you were asked, why didn't you negotiate something else in the deal for your horse at that time?

    If you NEED someone to help with your horse on certain days then why not approach both women and see if you can come up with a 3-way deal that works for everyone? In this case I would chart the days, chores and note the name of who is responsible and hang one on each horse's stall or something so that there is NO miscommunication going forward.
        12-02-2011, 03:51 AM
    One more thing, I would be very matter of fact about this and leave the emotions out of it. A simple, "I seem to have taken on some added responsiblity here without any added help in return and I was wondering if the three of us could revisit who is looking after the horses on which days to be certain that we are all equally sharing the workload and receiving equal benefits from this arrangement." If they balk at the thought of making things equitable then you have your answer: deal with it or find another alternative.
        12-02-2011, 08:41 AM
    Green Broke
    What I need is how to start to approach her about this. I know I'm getting the raw end. How do I begin the conversation? I'm not very good with words in person and tend to piss people off because I just don't know how to talk to people in person. I need to know how you guys would approach it, that is the question here.

    I did start bringing the other horse in because I didn't want her left in the turn out cold and hungry (it's been under 15 degrees here at night). She is an OTTB rescue that is already sick and lame from improper care by her previous owner and it's not her fault that her care was shoved onto someone else like this. I need to find the words to tell my friend that this isn't fair to me without turning this into a big war, because I don't want it to be a big huge fight, it makes it unpleasant for everyone else at the stable, not just us if we are arguing and fighting and mad at each other.
        12-02-2011, 08:57 AM
    Green Broke
    I would have handled it along time ago and wouldnt have needed to post a thread on a forum about it.
    I guess I can't comprehend the total lack of fortitude on your part.
    Someone else volunteered YOUR labor in a deal that benefited these two other people, with out your say so, or fore knowledge and you just went along with it and don't know how to approach the issue ? I just can't grasp how someone can be that way.
    Just tell them NO, jeeze loiuse, stand up for yourself. , UMMm Excuse me but I wont be tending your horses any longer.
        12-02-2011, 09:37 AM
    I understand what the OP is trying to say. HOWEVER the current situation came about, she is asking for ideas on how to broach the subject to these ladies.

    How this came about in the first place or what she should have done then is a moot point.

    OP, I would not come at these ladies with anger or frustration....that only serves to breed MORE anger and frustration. And I can understand why you don't want those you board with to be mean to you and/or your horse.

    BUT, you do need to resolve this. I would tell the other two women that the three of you need to make a schedule of who does what on what day. At our ex barn we did three boarders made a schedule, which was posted in the barn. We signed up for days and times when we cared for each others' horses. One of the ladies was a musician in a Celtic band, so she travelled alot, sometimes internationally....and would be gone for a week or more at a time. THe other lady and I picked up the slack...BUT, when she wasn't on tour, she would take care of our horses five out of seven days...especially is she had a tour coming up. Things would come up where someone couldn't make it on their assigned day once in a one of us would take over. We didn't get upset, life happens, kids get sick, cars break down, etc....but otherwise the schedule worked perfectly.

    Anyhow, approach these ladies and tell them that you all need to make up a schedule of who does what and when. ALSO, it is very important that you make it CLEAR what is expected of the person...i.e. What their duties include. We had that problem with our schedule at first, so we had a meeting and made it clear what was expected of you when you signed up for chores. That is where YOU will need to be kind but assertive. YOU will need to be sure that they understand that your horse MUST be turned out....PERIOD. Else the whole system is null and void.

    Good luck and please check back in and let us know how it goes....

    REmember: BOTTOM LINE IS: your horse must be turned out and receive the same quality of care you give to theirs. THAT is not negotiable.

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