Help! - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:22 AM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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Help!

I full lease my horse, and I love him with all my heart. I've put so much time and money into him. We are an incredible pair and place really well at shows. The issue is I hate the person who owns him. She makes people feel guilty for not doing barn chores for horses that aren't theirs. She takes others for granted, she doesn't care about her students, she gets mad at the easiest thing and then ignores you. She's unbelievable childish and immature.She won't let the show team have another life besides our horses and riding, and she makes us do the work she doesn't want to. I want to lease another horse from somewhere else, but I couldn't imagine having to give up my horse. I start to cry when I think of it, because he means the world to me. What should I do?
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post #2 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:30 AM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 584
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Hi. That is the problem with getting involved with other people's horses. I am sorry. Unless you were able to buy him, there is nothing that you can do other than continue as is or stop riding him and lease the other horse. The owner of the other horse could turn out the same as this one.


Do you pay to lease him? Are the barn chores part of your lease agreement? Is there life outside of horses?
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post #3 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:36 AM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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I do have a life outside of him, and his chores are apart of my agreement but I still pay a little bit for the use of her trailer and facility. But she continues to ask me to take care of the rest of her horses on a regular basis.

My lease is weird, I have all of the tack, I oversee farrier visits, I do chiropractic work and take care of him at night, and she does the morning. If he needs something it's on my to provide it

I just can't imagine giving him up, but I don't know if it's worth her being a horrible person a lot of the time
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post #4 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:40 AM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
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Seems to me that either you have a sit down talk with her explaining that you cannot do additional work outside of what you had both agreed on at the time you decided to lease him, or you stop leasing him. It is a decision only you can make.
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post #5 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:42 AM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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I'm just struggling to decide if it's worth it, and how much more of her crap I can take. Thank you for your help! This is so difficult, I don't think I can stand to lose him
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post #6 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:46 AM
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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Honestly, stick up for yourself. I have always had social anxiety and sticking up for myself has always been hard on me. But I was in a similar situation to yours. My trainer/BO was the same way, and finally one day, I had had enough. I wasn't rude, but I was straight forward. And from that day forward, I've been a lot better at sticking up for myself, and she wasn't that way with me anymore.

And there isn't any reason to be afraid of talking to her. The worst she can do is get mad. Tell her how you feel, and I"m sure she would understand. And, if you can afford it, ask her if she would sell him.

I hope this helps :)
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post #7 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 12:27 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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Thank you, I think I'm going to talk to her today
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post #8 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 03:00 PM
Trained
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
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It sounds like you are young?

Horses come and go. There have been many horses I have loved who either got sold, or some how fell out from under me. Every single horse has something to teach you! Don't be afraid to be move on.
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post #9 of 44 Old 11-24-2016, 03:40 PM
Trained
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Palmyra, Wisconsin
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If you are inclined to buy him ask her to sell him before you bring up other stuff.
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post #10 of 44 Old 11-25-2016, 08:02 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
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I can't buy him, I can't have a horse when I go off to college. And yes I'm fairly young. I just know he's the perfect horse for me. And giving him up just doesn't make sense. He does everything and is an amazing show horse, and I don't think I'll find another all around horse like him for the rest of my life.
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