How to quit a job someone won't let you quit?
I need some unbiased opinions here...
So I've been with the same trainer for around 3 years now. For the last 2 or so, I've worked off board and lessons from her. She is more than fair with compensation, and the deal has been gone on mostly problem free.
Those two years I was really strapped for cash, and it helped me have some extra in my pocket, and often I overextended myself to help her to earn extra. I suffered in school (I am in college, I will point out) because I was working way too many hours for her in combination with my job - I was always so tired I had trouble focusing and I rarely, if ever, had a real 'day off'. But at the time I was fine with it, it was what I wanted to do. I realized that I should have slowed down and put more time into my school a bit too late and had a passing, but poor grade on my finals.
I'm headed back to school late this year, after having to take a little time to figure out what I wanted to do - I had a change of heart and wanted to switch my major.
I don't want to blow this year by trying to pack too much into my life. I am at a different job now, I make more, and I can afford to pay for the services I get from my trainer and barn owner.
So I explained to my trainer a couple of weeks ago that I would be heading back to school, and I was also working full time and I wouldn't be able to work for her as much. I told her the jobs and times I would be avaliable, and that would be all I'd be able to do unless it was an emergency. She seemed to understand.
However, she has still been asking me to take on extra. Even going so far as to call me at work when I didn't answer my cell phone, to ask me for favors. She's done that twice. She does know my boss, but I found it incredibly unprofessional of her still. Once she wanted me to go and do the nightly chores (and this isn't a terribly small barn - 20 horses) after I got off work - after working a 12 hour day.
I live 40 minutes from our barn, and she knows that. She will call me out of the blue, ask me what I'm doing, and I will tell her I'm at home, and she will still ask me if I will go do a favor for her - what I get compensated just barely covers my gas to get there.
(I should add, the way I profitted in this previously was I tried to go do extra chores before or after work, as my work is closer to the barn than my house by far.)
She is always complaining about how tired she is, and how she needs a day off, ect, when she is around me. I feel like I'm just being paranoid, but I feel like its directed at me. I don't want to have to get sharp with her, but she's not really backing off, whether I blatantly tell her I won't be working as much anymore, or hint subtly and continue to tell her I can't go every time she calls.
I realize she's doing a lot more for herself now, but it IS her business - she doesn't work anywhere else. Plus, its not like I'm not paying for myself here.
The main thing I'm afraid of here is that if I have to be a little more aggressive about this issue, she will, for lack of a better term, "give me the cold shoulder" in lessons. She's a great trainer, she's brought my horse and I far and I am grateful to her for it. I don't want this to change our relationship but it is irritating and hurtful that she can't respect my need to have personal and school time, when I am willing to fully pay her the difference.