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A Messy Free Boarding Issue - Really Need Advice

This is a discussion on A Messy Free Boarding Issue - Really Need Advice within the Horse Boarding forums, part of the Barns, Boarding, and Farms category
  • How to talk to your dad about horse money issues

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    05-24-2012, 07:29 AM
  #11
Showing
Sounds to me that you thought Joe was great until he stopped buying stuff for you. Tell me OP, what happened to the tack that he bought for you that you're no longer using? Did you give it back to him, or sell it in order to buy what you have now?

As far as the other things, this is what I'm hearing: 'I don't WANT him or his horses here, and my parents should cater to what I want, not do something nice for their friend!'

As Calico said, either quit yipping and find a way to fence in the extra pasture, or if you're at the age of majority, maybe it's time to move off your parents' property and find out what being an adult is all about.

If you're still a minor, separate the horses for feeding. You have a round pen. It can be used to make sure low man on the totem pole gets his fair share.
     
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    05-24-2012, 07:41 AM
  #12
Showing
Since it's your parents' place they have a deciding voice on what to do. Either try to explain it all to parents in a nice and calm manner (not angry and frustrated), or just deal with it. As for the guy using your horse, if it's indeed your horse (and not your parents), than just approach him and tell him straight "NO".
     
    05-24-2012, 09:08 AM
  #13
Yearling
If you really want to know, the tack is still sitting in the tack room, unused. I stopped using it once I wanted Joe to stop using my horse. I don't want it, but I don't want to sell it, it's not mine.

My round pen is being used as extra panels into the run-in shed. I cannot use it to separate this other horse.

And just so you know, being 18 and going to the community college puts me in a very precarious situation. I can't afford boarding my horse somewhere and going off to another college. I work almost full-time trying to save money. And my friends don't know a thing about putting up fence panels. They aren't farm people or even horse people. I don't have the money or the experience to fence myself, and my parents won't be getting around to it.

If you can't give any good, helpful advice, get out of my thread. Nothing you said is helpful to my situation.
     
    05-24-2012, 09:31 AM
  #14
Weanling
Guys some of you are being very harsh. It's nice to help a friend out, her parents are very sweet for doing that. That being said friendship is a two way street, it should go both ways. The deal was made in the beginning and he isn't holding up his side of it. If he doesn't want to help fence in property where he is getting free board and hay, then he should look to someplace else.
By the way they are her parents, if anyone should be taking advantage it should be her, not sure why some of you have sympathy for this guy.
Corazon do you have the authority to tell this guy to leave your horse alone? If you do then just tell him. Send him a email or do it in a text message if you feel intimidated to tell him to his face. Hang tough girl.
Corazon Lock and KickinUpDust like this.
     
    05-24-2012, 09:32 AM
  #15
mls
Trained
Quote:
Originally Posted by Corazon Lock    
WHAT DO I DO????
Until you move out or start paying the bills - nothing you can do.

As you stated your parents are not concerned.

As a side note - Are you paying your parents for anything concerning your horses?
     
    05-24-2012, 10:11 AM
  #16
Green Broke
Being 19 myself, and yet to go to college, I still live at home and work full time. I pay my parents rent. The first of the month, I pay $140 to cover the cost of pasturing our two pasture puffs. The 15th of the month, I pay $100 for bills. After that, I buy everything myself. I paid my colt off in three months, paying $400 a month after the initial $300 deposit. I buy all of his tack, and will buy all of his food and board when he is weaned late August. Being a "college student" is no excuse.

That being said, building a fence isn't difficult. My dad and I built a fence ourselves out in the pasture to divide the back pasture because people were cutting our fences and our horses were getting out. We finished the fence on father's day, and no one was there to help my dad except me. Get a plan together, decide what material you want to use for the fence, and see if you can get someone to help. Initiate a conversation with Joe! "Would you be able to help me build a fence like you promised when you got here? It'd be a difficult job to do myself." It's simple. Don't expect help if you don't ask for it.
     
    05-24-2012, 10:14 AM
  #17
Weanling
It sounds to me like you're a pretty lucky girl. You're an adult and yet your parents are still letting you live at home. They're still paying for horses that they don't get use out of. That doesn't sound like a precarious position to me, it sounds like a position wherein you should be very grateful for the parents you have.

Now, the only thing it sounds like you can do is build a fence. You don't have to use panels. How about electric fence to make small paddocks for feeding time? You put them in and feed, explain (nicely and without blaming it on Joe) to your parents that the new horse won't get enough food if they're not separated for eating because he's such a timid guy, and ask them if they'll just open the gates in an hour (or however long it takes them to finish whatever food they need to be separated for).
     
    05-24-2012, 10:28 AM
  #18
Foal
Corazon, unfortunately like the majority of people have said, there's not a lot you can do. One Question, Rusty, is he yours, what I mean by that is did you buy him or is your parents -?father - the legal owner? If your parents are the legal owners of Rusty you have a slightly bigger problem. If he is yours legally then you have every right on this earth to tell Joe to leave your horse the heck alone! If this horse is legally the property of your parents, you are going to find some eway to convince them that letting Joe or anybody not approved by yourself ride your horse is counterproductive to all the training and time you are putting into your horse. Maybe if they are paying, or helping you pay hearing that letting Joe ride rusty is detrimental to his training and thus indirectly wasting their money. If you are paying for your own lessons, talk to them like an adult, tell them please, you work hard to afford those lessons to better yourself and your horse and letting Joe ride him is undoing a lot of hard work and wasting your hard-earned money.
As for the other horses, I feel your pain, but without your parents' support there's not really anything you can do about that situation. You can try talking to your dad like an adult and tell him that not being able to feed Knight apart is wasting precious money spent on grain. Most of all, keep your cool and get your facts in a very logical order. Approach your parents as the adult you now almost are and try and find some solutions, even if you have to compromise a little, especially on the "other horses" scenario. Your parents are NOT going to listen to what you have to say if you come across even in the slightest like a spoilt brat (no offence meant, please). Lastly find a way to lock up your tack, a box, a cupboard, anything.
     
    05-24-2012, 12:03 PM
  #19
Green Broke
Quote:
Originally Posted by Corazon Lock    
I would LOVE to. But the thing is, this is technically my parent's property. And my parents are letting him keep his horses here, not me. If it were my decision, I would have had his horses to the curb a long time ago. But they won't do anything about it! I tried confronting my dad about either kicking the horses out or having him pay board and he's like, "Joe's my friend...I haven't kicked your friends out of my house, so KNOCK IT OFF."

UGH. My parents are way too nice.
You really don't have a say as it is not your property. I am not sure of your age but if it were me I would get some independence and move my horse even if I had to pay board some where else.
     
    05-24-2012, 02:25 PM
  #20
Started
Why don't you talk with your parents about the cost of fencing. All you need is some t-posts, electric white horse fence, and an electric box, a sledge hammer, a flathead screwdriver , and whatever is needed for the electric box.

I would see if your parents could talk with joe about splitting the cost of adding more fencing seeing as I think its 2 horses of his there, and then you split the cost with your parents on whats left.

All you need is two ppl and a good attitude and you could have a good size field made in a half day if your determined to get it done with no experience putting fencing up...

Tips if you get the t-post- get the 10ft height posts and strand it with 4 rows, electrify the wire that is the average height of all horses heads. Keep posts 6-10ft apart no more no less..its inefficent!! One person hold post the other hammer the post into ground. Make sure you plan where you want the gate so you can figure out how to set the wire up to start... if you are going to use a real gate get a piece of wood that is suitable to hold a normal gate..not sure of size as my dad bought the fencing stuff then left it to me to put up myself :P learning experience my dad said lol

Its really not that hard and you with the help of your mom, dad, friend, cousin, who ever to get it done:) that would solve the issue with fencing and some hay problems for the time being.

As for your tack being used put it in your room , as for your horse being used..idk I would have flipped a s*** a long time ago about that one when it first started.
crimsonsky likes this.
     

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