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Upset friends and I don't know what else to do

This is a discussion on Upset friends and I don't know what else to do within the Horse Boarding forums, part of the Barns, Boarding, and Farms category

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        07-08-2012, 03:13 PM
      #31
    Weanling
    Thanks Dreamcatcher. I think that this boarding agreement will turn the tide and make them take it seriously. I will be charging pretty much the standard rate for the boarding facilities around here, some of which have nicer places than I do (I'm not set up for boarding and don't really want to do it).

    I think that why they haven't been serious about things is the fact that everything was free. My time and knowledge to run around and help them find the horses, my time and knowledge to teach them how to care for the horses, riding lessons, use of horse trailers, board and pasture, stall cleaning, feeding and watering, teaching how to tack up, tack storage, etc. etc. I don't regret at all helping them, I like to help people. But when I say enough I do want to be taken seriously.

    Again everyone, thanks for your support! I hope this all turns out well and we can maintain a friendship, but after considering what everyone says, I think I get it!
         
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        07-08-2012, 03:16 PM
      #32
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Whisper22    
    I think it's kind of funny how everyone keeps saying 9 horses on 5 acres is an accident waiting to happen. Not because it's not true, just because we have 9 horses on 1 acre and have only seen 2 injuries in 5 years due to horses getting kicked, or anything else for that matter. Maybe we're just lucky.

    It's a shame this happened, but it sounds like they are taking responsibility, so that's good. My horse got kicked and it cut open her back leg. Took at least 2 weeks of doctoring. When my horse did the same thing to another horse, I took it upon myself to buy supplies needed and doctor it whenever I was there.
    Yeah, its funny that everyone seems to have not read the whole threads to realize I don't actually keep 9 horses on 5 acres, that is was a short one-time occurrence due to an escape. Funny thing is they were only all together for about two hours.
         
        07-08-2012, 04:58 PM
      #33
    Trained
    I guess even if they were together on 5 acres it might work for some groups of horses.
    (I am one of the ones that didn't read that ......... )

    My horses are too aggressive for that. When I put them (7 of them) in a smaller area, they chase each other constantly. I suppose they would work it out if they had to.
         
        07-10-2012, 07:11 PM
      #34
    Green Broke
    I will throw this in there. The above is exactly why I caution anyone about trying to help friends out for free especially.

    And I also imagine that they will have fine time with aggressive horse when they have to deal with it.

    In every instance that I know of though, most of the time this same type of thing has happened.

    Just glad you are getting it worked out and.....

    Don't do this again! Sorry, couldn't resist.
    waresbear and Silent one like this.
         
        07-10-2012, 09:31 PM
      #35
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Palomine    

    Just glad you are getting it worked out and.....

    Don't do this again! Sorry, couldn't resist.
    Oh hopefully I've learned my lesson. You can't do free things for people, then they always just expect more and more, I guess.

    And yes, they got the boarding agreement. And yes, now they are really upset with me. Got the list of how many things they have done for me, etc. etc. I've tried to respond kindly without getting angry myself, but I'm sticking to my guns. Explained my position on everything the best I can, now will pray about it and leave it in God's hands.

    Part of what was e-mailed back to me is that I should have come and talked to them about being overwhelmed and they would have "helped" me. Well, the help I need is for them to take responsibility for their horses and move them, not "help" me. Even though it is more work, the bigger issue is having to many horses behind my house. Now their horses are in a small corral and using half out the outside stalls, so I can't separate mine at feeding time, and they don't eat the same thing or same amounts. So I have to bring my two in to feed them, then go back out and let them out.

    I can't keep their horses penned up in a small area all the time, so they have to be turned out too sometimes. Which means I have to put my two up (I only keep two here behind the house) in order to let theirs out. Which means more stall cleaning and more bedding. Aw heck, its just more work and aggravation and I am tired. I work over an hour away from home, so two hours on the road every day, roughly 9-10 hours at work each day, I don't look for extra work after that, LOL!

    Thanks for letting me vent!
         
        07-11-2012, 10:28 PM
      #36
    Weanling
    Wow! I just read the whole thread..OP you have a heart of gold. You should not have needed to ask for your "friend's" help..they should have been tripping over themselves to help. I will give them a little slack since they had no clue what the actual work load was..but that is being generous. I agree with the other posters completely that you were being taken advantage of. Stick to your guns..don't let them appeal to that golden heart of yours...you deserve better !
    Silent one likes this.
         
        07-11-2012, 11:38 PM
      #37
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Silent one    
    Oh hopefully I've learned my lesson. You can't do free things for people, then they always just expect more and more, I guess.

    And yes, they got the boarding agreement. And yes, now they are really upset with me. Got the list of how many things they have done for me, etc. etc. I've tried to respond kindly without getting angry myself, but I'm sticking to my guns. Explained my position on everything the best I can, now will pray about it and leave it in God's hands.

    That right there is how I always know I've been taken advantage of, KNOWINGLY, by the parties that did it. They get mad when I draw the line in the sand and then try to deflect everything back to being my fault somehow. Ok, I'll buy that it's my fault for setting myself up to be taken advantage of but, you need to accept that you used me hard, put me up wet and then got indignant when I caught on.

    People are soooo predictable! I'm glad you're the prayerful type, Silent One, they'd have heard me yelling 3 counties away without a phone, tin can or a string.
    DimSum likes this.
         
        07-12-2012, 12:19 AM
      #38
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Dreamcatcher Arabians    
    That right there is how I always know I've been taken advantage of, KNOWINGLY, by the parties that did it. They get mad when I draw the line in the sand and then try to deflect everything back to being my fault somehow. Ok, I'll buy that it's my fault for setting myself up to be taken advantage of but, you need to accept that you used me hard, put me up wet and then got indignant when I caught on.

    People are soooo predictable! I'm glad you're the prayerful type, Silent One, they'd have heard me yelling 3 counties away without a phone, tin can or a string.
    Actually, I'm kind of with you there, because that's what I really really want to do. But I'm trying to hold on to my temper because I have a terrible one when it gets out of the bag, so lots of prayer helps!
         
        07-12-2012, 08:00 AM
      #39
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Silent one    
    Actually, I'm kind of with you there, because that's what I really really want to do. But I'm trying to hold on to my temper because I have a terrible one when it gets out of the bag, so lots of prayer helps!
    LOL! I have a very good friend who has the same kind of temper I do, and sounds like maybe you too. We refer to our bad tempered, alter egos as 'Mini'. As in, "OMG, you better be glad you weren't with me today at the hay dealer's place. Mini got out of her box and just let him have it." or "Oh, I went all Mini on her alright!"......Mini can be a very mean individual and is best kept in her box and fed as little as possible.
         
        07-12-2012, 10:10 AM
      #40
    Weanling
    OMG! I have a Mini too!!!!!!! We need a club!
    Posted via Mobile Device
         

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