07-04-2013, 05:06 PM
| || |
Well my update is that I'm angry with myself. I chickened out.
My parents still haven't told me if they'll 'play along' and approach BO for me but it was looking like a 'No' so I told myself I'd ask today after the festival if BO was in a good mood. She wasn't in a good mood but it also wasn't terrible, and I put in a hard days work so I should have just asked her, but I didn't. I kept going 'what if she says no?!' in my head and psyched myself out. And it didn't help that she was completely surrounded by people who I find to be equally as scary (including her husband and her son. Her son hates me for some reason and I can definitely see him trying to convince her not to sell and say he wants her, not because he REALLY wants Kenzie but to disappoint me. And he rules the farm.) so I psyched myself out even more. I was waiting to get her alone or semi-alone and never did, so I lost my chance :/ Stupid. I have no excuse except that I'm scared to death of 'no'. What then?
Now I'm just debating sucking it up and calling her in a little while, or waiting til Saturday face to face again...