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The struggle draws to a close

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        06-06-2012, 02:08 AM
      #31
    Green Broke
    I'm sorry for your loss. Many ((((Hugs))))
         
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        06-06-2012, 04:21 AM
      #32
    Yearling
    Barry,
    I am so very sorry....your horse was amazing, I enjoyed hearing about you two and will miss the updates.
    Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Susan
         
        06-11-2012, 09:52 AM
      #33
    Started
    Every thing it life seems to have a price. I received through the post today, the invoice relating to DiDi's last day. There were a few tests, a report and then the dastardly deed and finally the clearing up thereafter.

    Thinking about it, for a moment my eyes started to water, but I held them back which suggests I am getting better.

    The tack has all been cleaned and put away in our tack room.
    The stable yard has been sorted.
    The insurance company sent me a piece of paper, saying DiDi had been removed from the policy. That is odd, because to me she was the policy.

    People say to me it is time to move on. Well it isn't really. I am not ready.
         
        06-11-2012, 09:56 AM
      #34
    Green Broke
    I find it so odd that people think they are helping whan they say, "it is time to move on", unless they are in your heart, they have no idea. DiDi was in your heart and she is the only one who can say when it is time to move on.

    My heart aches for you.
         
        06-11-2012, 02:29 PM
      #35
    Started
    Taffy - DiDi's not going anywhere - she is in the back of my mind all the time.

    And I have just ordered a big photo of her and me to go on the wall at the bottom of the stairs.

    Thank you for your kind thoughts
    crimsonsky and Taffy Clayton like this.
         
        06-11-2012, 02:41 PM
      #36
    Green Broke
    I also have a 24 x 36 painting of my "Taffy" above my fireplace.
         
        06-12-2012, 01:23 PM
      #37
    Yearling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Barry Godden    

    People say to me it is time to move on. Well it isn't really. I am not ready.
    I lost my heart horse last year. I still haven't moved on. It's gotten better, sure, but I still miss her. Always will.

    Barry, grief is a process. NO ONE can tell you how fast or how slow you should move through it. This mare obviously meant something to you, and some people just don't understand that they are not just animals.

    Don't let anyone tell you that you should get over it, or that she was just a horse. I've never even met you and it is blatantly obvious that she meant much more to you than words can express.

    I am deeply sorry for your loss. You have my prayers.


    GOD'S FOAL
    I'll lend you for a little while
    My grandest foal, He said,
    For you to love while she's alive
    And mourn for when she's dead.

    It may be one or twenty years,
    Or days or months, you see.
    But, will you, till I take her back,
    Take care of her for me?

    She'll bring her charms to gladden you,
    And should her stay be brief,
    You'll have treasured memories
    To bring solace in your grief.

    I cannot promise she will stay,
    Since all from earth return.
    But, there are lessons taught on earth
    I want this foal to learn.

    I've looked the wide world over
    In my search for teachers true.
    And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes
    With trust I have selected you.

    Now will you give her your total love,
    Nor think the labour vain,
    Nor hate Me when I come
    To take her back again?

    I know you'll give her tenderness
    And love will bloom each day.
    And for the happiness you've known
    Forever grateful stay.

    But should I come and call for her
    Much sooner than you'd planned,
    You'll brave the bitter grief that comes
    And someday understand.
         
        06-13-2012, 06:55 AM
      #38
    Started
    Lakota - thank you for your kind words and a moving poem.

    The problem is she has gone but not left me yet I can't stroke her any more.

    B G
         
        06-13-2012, 07:48 AM
      #39
    Showing
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Barry Godden    
    People say to me it is time to move on. Well it isn't really. I am not ready.
    I hope you don't consider any of these "people" your friends. No ONE has a right to say that to you, or even cause you to feel that way!!

    You aren't a school girl crying over your favourite pop idol that got voted off the X Factor. It's seriously MUCH more than that, and you deserve unbridled, consistent support in your time of such loss.

    Let only the good beautiful thoughts of your beloved DiDi remain true in your heart and mind; don't let others try and wisp them away with a cheap flea market fan.

    Grr makes me very mad. You should be allowed to feel anything you want to, without judgement or prodding or influence from anyone else.

    I'm going to go polish my ass-kicking boots now. May need them soon.

    Quote:
    "JUST A HORSE..."
    From time to time, people tell me, "lighten up, it's just a horse," or,"that's a lot of money
    For just a horse".

    They don't understand the distance traveled, the time spent, or the costs, both financial
    And emotional, involved for "just a horse." Some of my proudest moments have come
    About with "just a horse."

    Many hours have passed and my only company was "just a horse," but I did not once feel slighted. Some of my saddest moments have been brought about by "just a horse," and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch of "just a horse" gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day.

    If you, too, think it's "just a horse," then you will probably understand phrases like "just a friend," "just a sunrise," or "just a promise."

    "Just a horse" brings into my life the very essence of friendship, trust, and pure unbridled joy. "Just a horse" brings out the compassion and patience that make me a better person. Because of "just a horse" I will rise early, take long walks and look longingly to the future.

    So for me and folks like me, it's not "just a horse" but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future, the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment.

    "Just a horse" brings out what's good in me and diverts my thoughts away from myself and the worries of the day.

    I hope that someday they can understand that it's not "just a horse" but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being "just a person."
    DiDi rest in peace. You brought Barry such joy and deserve recognition and to be remembered for the rest of our living days.
         
        06-13-2012, 10:18 AM
      #40
    Started
    SKy, It is strange isn't it - some folks can't understand why the companionship of a good horse is such a blessing to experience in life.

    Don't worry I have learned how to respond to such ignorant people.

    My problem is that I have not yet worked out how to fill the hole in my day that DiDi has left. I suppose with time, I will

    Barry
         

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