I haven't posted on here for a while - hols and long work days! - but really can't not say anything here.
I'm not sure if you don't adopt people's advice because theres too much, too quickly.... but I really think it's in your interest to try to take in some of it! After all as everyone says - we want you to be safe!
HORSE LEANING INTO THE TURNS
(example about 5 secs into the video)
This is potentially very dangerous. The horse should be vertical and flexed around your inside leg, with your outside led controlling his hind quarters around the bend. Leaning like this, increasing the risk of him tripping over or slipping. Additionally, you need to sink more weight into your outside stirrup - you're centre of gravity exaggerates this lean. You hands should hardly do ANYTHING!
INTERMITTANT/INCONSISTANT REIN CONTACT
Your hands are planted low at the pommel of the saddle. This is normally a sign of a rider who feels unbalanced. Added to this, they don't move - the result is that Rowdy has no rein contact, yet any (natural) flexion of his neck results in a dig in the mouth. You can see this around 26 secs in.
You should be able to feel the natural movements in the neck across all gaits - after all, this is how the horse balances! (It's like us running and not swinging our arms!)
JUMPING THE STRAIGHT
You adopted your forward position about 6m out from the jump - if Rowdy ducked out, you'd be making the jump alone. This leaning forward is also the universal signal of 'GO GO GO'! Which seems a little contradictory to me (so certainly your horse), if you're actually trying to prevent him from rushing??
Personally, neither of you are ready to jump - and I am sorry to have to tell you this. It terrifies me that you say you've jumped over 4 foot....
Your horse really needs to relax and, to do this, you need to relax as well. Your hand position, upper body tilting forward and legs braced forward smacks of someone who doesn't trust their horse, or is even scared of it. Any tenseness in you will pass to your horse.
I think it's at 22 secs in, you slow to a walk; Rowdy's head drops and you sit still. This is the most relaxed he looks - good job! However, you then psyche him up again... and to control him eventually you stick him at a wall!! From my experience this just causes nervous horses to back up and rear, as they feel trapped.
If this offends you, then I AM sorry, but if Rowdy was a my stables, I would be speaking to your mum about finding you something else to ride, so that your confidence isn't knocked further.
!!Also - could you make sure the arena is tidy before you jump - there looks like a tarpaulin on the floor in one shot - or have I mistook that???!!