It doesn't necessarily sound like she's against taking lessons, it simply sounds like she just hasn't taken any as of yet; maybe because of finances, or lack of decent english type trainers in her area, etc... alot of things can inhibit lessons, not just because a person is 'against' it...
To the OP, I think you've come a long way already; would finding a good trainer help, possibly, but I think you've already got a good foundation built; you can only get better. It seems like you've got a good minded, willing horse to learn on, as well, and that is a great thing to have.
*shrugs shoulders, and grins* I learned how to jump bareback on trails over timbers that were strewn over the trails...we would purposely add more timbers too!
"The ideal horseman has the courage of a lion, the patience of a saint, and the hands of a woman..."