*Sigh* Selling her =(

So I have decided to sell or trade Lola for a quieter horse. It is not that she isn't quiet...She is just afraid of everything and has become for spooky lately. Today some of the sand in the arena was flattened. She would jump everytime we went past it. I walked her over it about 20 times and she would still stop and back up..I cannot handle her. She trots to fast. I have tried slowing her down with circles etc but nothing works. I am always stiff on her. When she canters she pulls her head down and runs through the bit. She does not gallop around but she just ignores the bit totally when cantering and will only stop when she wants too.

I love her so so much but I do not want to own a horse I do not want to ride.


So some good things about her. She jumps up to 90cm/3ft courses. She is quiet around other horses. She is easy to load/shoe/catch. She is really sweet. When she is in season she does not get moody at all. She is in season now and she is like the same horse. You can leave her for months then ride her and she will not do a thing wrong. She is a fairly easy keeper when out 24/7. She is perfect in traffic. She is willing to please. Before I got her she had never jumped before so she is a quick learner.

So does anyone think she will sell or if anyone would trade a quieter horse for her?

Oh and she is a 10 year old bay TB.

I will add pictures and make a video later.

Picturesss...

Aww this makes me sad. You don't think with more time and training (for both of you) that it could work out?

I have no idea what the horse market is like where you are so I can't really guess if she'd sell or not.

Didn't she just spend a lot of time on stall rest? It could be she is just fresh from not getting worked much lately. Did you ever figure out what was going on with her lameness and hair loss?

Oh im sorry to hear. It sounds to me like she needs more flat work and from the pics it looks like she's bracing against and/or avoiding the bit, and her ears are pinned in a lot of the pics. That usually tells me there is physical discomfort somewhere. She looks like she needs a lot of trot work to build muscle and balance and then she will be a lovely horse. Just remember going slow takes a lot more muscle, effort, and conditioning than going faster or rushed at all.

All that said, if more training for her (and / or you with her) isn't an option, it may be best to part ways. Looking for a trade may be a good option as while she is talented, I don't know that from the pics I can see her doing a 3' course properly, though she certainly has loads of talent. As for sale price that is hard to say with how many TBs are out there right now but she definitely seems to me to be sellable with a ton of potential and with the right training and flat work, the potential to be a lovely jumper or even eventer. I just think she needs some holes in her training filled, and to learn to be soft and responsive to a simple snaffle and rebuild her responsiveness to the aids.

Best of luck to you and her - she is absolutely lovely!

As an aside I always say when your horse isn't listening to you or there is a disconnect, go back to the basics. Take off all the training aids, nosebands, etc., and ride in just a simple solid, single, or double jointed snaffle and that will help you identify pretty quickly where the horse is missing training. Is she gaping at the bit? Chomping? Evading? Pulling? Work on communication with the simplest of devices and then go from there. I ride all of my horses especially all off season with no martingales, nosebands, curb reins, nothing. Just the basics - to keep them AND ME in tune! :) it really works if you are willing to give that a try - just know it's a slow method and it does take time!

I am going to say that I don't think there is ANYTHING wrong with deciding to sell or trade a horse that you have decided is not being what you want, not doing what you want and making riding a chore instead of fun and enjoyable. Sure I imagine working with a trainer, getting professional help, quick fixes, long term fixes are all possible, but if you are not enjoying your horse, then it is time to do exactly what you are thinking of doing.
The best thing I ever did was trade a 6 year old that I was not happy with, did not enjoy riding and even got to making excuses why I did not have time to ride for a 7 yr old mare that was suited and trained just how I liked her. She is almost 9 and the past almost two years have been so enjoyable and fun, and I love to ride again.
I advertised her in the local "online ads" wanting to sell or trade the 6yr old for a older well trained horse and Smokie is what I got.
Don't feel bad about giving up, there are way to many good horses that you will enjoy out there and plenty of folks are willing and even want to work with a horse that has issues. Funny thing is, sometimes when the right person climbs aboard a horse that you are not in sync with, that person immediately jells and they work.
I know how much advice is given for getting a trainer, etc but sometimes a person can't afford a trainer, I know I can't. So, you have to work with what you have and what you can afford and working with a horse that does not sync with you is not fun.

I also completely agree with wyominggrandma - just because she IS fixable doesn't mean YOU need to fix her, nor does it mean that you are not capable of riding or fixing her, just that you want a horse you can enjoy now.

I said something similar in a few threads where people were asking if a sale horse was worth it. I always say ask yourself if you are willing to put the time and money into a horse that isn't what you want now to be the horse you want them to be? Or does it make more sense for you to find a horse that is what you want now that you can enjoy riding, showing, trail riding - whatever your personal goals are - now rather than later? At the end of the day that applies to selling also. Does your emotional attachment towards your horse warrant you putting additional time and training into the situation when there are other horses out there that may be what you want right now? Would you rather have a horse you can do what you want with now, and build the bond over time, or have a horse you have a bond with now but that you can't ride the way you want at this point in time?

At the end of the day the answer is all up to you - and what makes the most sense for you and your wants and needs when it comes to your horse and equine goals.

Either way - there are lots of options. Sort through them all and see which makes the most sense to you :) *hugs* selling a horse is never easy when you do care about the horse, but sometimes it is for the best. Follow your heart and gut and I am sure things will work out!

Sarah, Judgeing from the many posts you have shared with us, I think this might be a wise decision on your part. I bet you have mulled this over and over in your head for a long time, no? If you have a horse that isn't fun to ride, scares you and frustrates you , and you don't have real help onhand (this forum does not count as real help), then you may or may not be able to pull yourself out of this place. If you can find her a good place and a rider who is just ahead of you on the spectrum of experience and training, then Lola will be better off , too.
You cannot wish yourself into being a better rider than you are. It takes time, time and more time. There is NO shame in acknowledging this. There are a lot of horses out there that are WAY over my head and I would be really uncomfortable if I had to ride them daily.

For two years I leased a horse that in actuality was Just over my head. I managed, but it was always just by the skin of my teeth. I did get to be a better rider, but riding in fear all the time was not fun.

Having a hrose that I can get up on, go for a ride and pretty much know that he will not hand me more than I can deal with has made me enjoy riding so much more, and though he is not as challengeing of a ride, I feel that my confidence has actually increased, not decreased.

So, this is meant to say not to feel embarassed or anything. Just start looking and be hopeful that you will find yourself a much better suited horse soon.
Wishing you luck on the journey.

Caroline

Thank you all for such kind comments! It is really helping me. I will answer them all in a while I just gotta go get some food =P

But I did read the first post before I went out earlier and it had me thinking maybe I could try again with her. I was thinking of trying a different bit tomorrow. But I always do this! I always say I am going to sell her then someone says just keep trying then I do and it goes well until something happens again =/

Oh and yes she had box rest but even before that she rushed her trotting and pulled against the bit in canter. That is why I am going to try a less harsh bit to see if it will help