I am not sure what you are looking for in this thread. Given your responses perhaps the only option is to take lessons on another horse.
Losing your patience with a horse will never lead to success in any dimension of horsemanship. You must either change your approach, which you don't seem too willing to do, or try another horse before you really sour the relationship further by continuing to nag him ineffectively.
Yes, I sympathise to an extent and it does seem like he is a particularly obstinate character. I wonder if your instructor is having you ride him as something of a test? It may just be that he is beyond your experience level at this point. I wouldn't suggest such a thing so blatantly except for the fact that you have stated that others do not experience the same problems.
I am frustrated, and expressing that frustration. It seemed better to do that here than to tell this horse that if he cut up one more time, I would personally load his butt on the truck to Mexico.
Sympathy or useful suggestions would be nice, but there appears to be a lot of jumping to the conclusion that this horse is behaving well for everyone but me. This is not what I have said. What I have said is that this horse behaves very badly on the ground for everyone,
that I am the only one who won't put up with that, and that all of
the people who ride him without a huge amount of pushback and arguments from him are people who ride with crops. I am not sure how any of this leads to the assumption that the main problem is with me,
since his behavior with anyone who is 1) not on his back and 2) wielding a crop while they are up there is disrespectful (and I said all of that before here).
I would also like to explore in what ways I can change my approach, because listening to my teacher and doing what she tells me to doesn't seem to be working. I am doing exactly what she suggests, and he either doesn't pay attention, or he pays attention once and then stops listening thereafter. The other thing that hasn't worked is requiring him to deliver respect, or at least the appearance of respect, from the ground.
The teacher is the one who told me to kick him, because he wasn't listening to my leg. She is also the one who observed that he was trying to avoid listening to the aids by acting up in other ways. I am wondering if there is some other trick, other than increasing the intensity of my requests via the aids, because I am already doing that as instructed
, to get and keep this little blighter's attention, or if there are some horses that just need to know that the crop is there and will get used.
Additionally, I am concerned that riding this horse is teaching me bad habits. I do not think that I should have to haul on a horse's mouth like I'm towing a truck with my bare hands. I would prefer not to kick a horse at all, let alone to have to do it pre-emptively every time I get to the X or M.
My preference is to ride another horse, because I have none
of these problems with the four other horses I have ridden at this stable.
I am not sure how to handle this with the stable. If I were making any headway at all with this horse, it would be one thing. I have
gotten to the point where it's easier for me to catch him than it is for most of the other people who ride him. And he makes no more than a token effort with the bad behavior in the ties when I get him there. He does
understand that even though the others let him get away with any old thing in the ties, he cannot do that with me. If I was seeing that kind of progress in the nonsense under saddle, I wouldn't be so frustrated, but I'm not. Every time I ride him it's the same dratted thing - he cuts up, I correct him, he gets bored, or tired of listening, and then it goes directly downhill. It has gotten to the point where I feel like any lesson on him is wasted, because I spend the entire
time dealing with his nonstop challenges and arguments. I do not want to ride him, because he is a pain in the butt. For everyone, not just for me.
He can get away with it with me under saddle easier than he can with the others, but it doesn't mean that he doesn't try.