I wrote about three falls I had this year, two on horseback, one where I literally ran myself into a wall by tripping on a rubber backed runner and that was the worst fall of all of them, although the dressage one was pretty fierce.
They happened within a few weeks of one another.
Each fall cut into my confidence.
Now each time I mount, I have a moment. I can FEEL my hesitation. My heart races. My chest gets tight. I put my foot in the stirrup and lift up and when I plunk my big butt in the saddle, I breathe out. Then I move forward.
I know this sport can be dangerous. I take precautions. I AM VERY VERY CAUTIOUS. I check everything - my girth, my stirrup length, my seat, if I don't care for how I feel, I stop. I don't do anything more than I think I can do. And still, there are no guarantees and I know it because I KNOW IT now. I've been on my back looking up at the ceiling so I know.
I can't say to you ride. I can say go slowly. Go groom your horse. Spend time with him or her. Go into the stall and relax with your favorite, talk, groom, feed them treats and pick their hooves and brush their manes and tails.
Halter your horse and walk around. Talk. Tell him or her what's on your mind. I know that sounds nuts but why not. They love that stuff and if you love horses, so do you.
If you never rode again, then you'll never ride again it would not be the be all end all of the world, but you don't have to give up horses either. You can spend time with them. You can go to a rescue barn and help out. THere's a lot of things you can do with horses if you don't want to ride.
I'm 66 and I'm new and gung ho. At some point, this will not be a lope lope gung ho crazy riding me. At some point it will be I think I better pleasure ride today. Or even I think I better go help at a rescue because my back hurts or I don't want to risk a fall. Who knows?
But riding isn't all of it. Horses are, I think.