Hurt physically and emotionally..need advice please - Page 3 - The Horse Forum
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post #21 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 12:03 PM
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Originally Posted by corgi View Post
Thanks...that is why i feel so confused about what I should do.

Take more lessons so you can feel more confident and be able to stick through the times when things are not so "perfect".
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post #22 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 12:04 PM
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No horse is totally bombproof but as an old chick who got her butt busted badly trying a horse 3 years ago I am going to go with walk away from this horse.

Yeah, he is probably a good horse, this may have been a one off thing blah blah blah. The thing here for you is trust and confidence. I used to be the most confident rider years ago. Rode bareback at any speed, could ride a reining horse doing rollbacks that was just way too much fun, rode a racing filly so fast tears were streaming out of my eyes because I didn't have googles on.

Now, I went to try a horse 3 years ago. A horse 'that had been shown in western pleasure, rode by an 8 year old, rode by a beginner' took off running and bucking til I came off. Was I hurt? OMG yes I was to the tune of my leg from thigh to foot deep purple, hugely swollen. Got a skin infection, severe nerve damage, threatened with a hospital stay if I didn't get the blood to drain out of it. My cousin saw pics of my leg recently and she is the director of a huge ER here. She said "do you have any idea of how much blood you lost?" Gaaaa.

Ok...the end result was I lost ALL of my confidence. My leg is still discolored all over where the blood pooled...a constant reminder of getting hurt. It hurt for more than a year if anything brushed up against it. Ugh. I did buy a horse 2 months later but it has taken 3 years of riding to get back even a small amount of my confidence.

I would say pass on the horse because of your own trust issues. It could be very hard for you to get past that. I know that any horse can buck but really, even though this horse hadn't been ridden in 2 years for him to buck you off for no more than making him walk away from some grass is really a red flag for me.

My gelding I have now is calm and quiet no matter what. He rarely gets upset yet is very forward and loves to go.

Find a horse that has loads of miles. Recent miles. Biscuit was ridden at least once a month on long trail rides by different people each time the year before I got him. The year prior to that he was ridden a ton in all kinds of situations. He is pretty bomb proof or as bomb proof as any horse will be.

I am so sorry you were hurt. It is a scary feeling and something I still work on each time I ride. Biscuit has never tried to run away with me and yet it is always in the back of my mind about a bolting horse. Hope you heal quickly and are back in the saddle again.

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Last edited by QOS; 01-01-2012 at 12:08 PM. Reason: spelling!!!
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post #23 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 12:26 PM Thread Starter
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It is noon, and I can't get out of bed. I get lightheaded and almost pass out everytime I try. As long as I don't move, I don't feel pain. Lovin my ipad...think I will be spending a lot of time on it.

I want to thank everyone for the responses. The only thing I am sure of right now is that I will continue to ride my leased mare and take lessons. Luckily, the owner of Sonny is not in any rush to transfer ownership so I don't have to make a decision about him anytime soon. Besides, I think it is going to be a few weeks before I get up on any horse.

Looks like I will be starting at square one with tons of ground work, regardless of what horse I end up with. My confidence is shattered.
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post #24 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 12:40 PM
Green Broke
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Take it slow. I know all about the shattered confidence. I so feel for you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Take little baby steps and it will come back.
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post #25 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 01:36 PM
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I'm sorry this happened to you. I agree w/ QOS to find another horse.
This guy sounds very sweet and I'm sure he's a kind horse on the ground. But he doesnt' sound trustworthy under saddle.

I've read the story and few times and I can't quite understand the situation but it appears he wanted to eat grass and you wanted him to keep going and he bucked? His momentary hissy fit has hurt you pretty bad and it could have been worse.
All horses can buck, spin, act up, but it's the circumstances under which it happens that I take into consideration. I'm a beginner and I don't know this horse, but it sounds to me like he's just spoiled with his life as a pasture pet (as others have mentioned). He doesn't want to be told what to do. I've read of many horses like this who do get whipped into shape and become a reliable steady mount in no time. The key is, it takes an experienced rider to get them back in working order. This horse definitely has hope and potential. But he is a project right now. And if I were you, I wouldn't want him to be my project.
Keep looking and you'll find a sweet and more dependable horse.

Again, JMO, but I'd prefer buying from a barn or basically someplace where a horse has been used regularly and handled by different people. If I was going to buy directly from an owner, I'd have to know and trust the owner that they are being honest. In this case, she is saying he's been in the pasture for two years. It could have been really 3 or 4 years of him doing nothing but being fed carrots and treats and being spoiled rotten. So yeah he's sweet and loves attention as long as he's not working. Pass on this guy. Sorry :(
Hope you feel better soon. Take it slow. There are plenty of horses out there.
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post #26 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 02:28 PM
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A consideration re: your decision to keep the horse or not (forgive me if you've already said): what is likely to happen to him if you don't take him.
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post #27 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 02:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Northern View Post
A consideration ,,,,,,,, what is likely to happen to him if you don't take him.
Not her problem and not anything she should waste even one minute worrying about.
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post #28 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 02:46 PM
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Is there a way that you could have a nice chat with his owner, maybe go over his history, his quirks, his personality...just get to know him from another rider's point of view? It sounds to me like he is a decently trained, albeit rusty horse, with definate potential. It also sounds as if his owner really wants what is best for her gelding, anda if that is the case, she would probably love to talk about him with you. Mention the incident to her. She might have had a similar situation with him and will have a better idea of whether he was throwing a temper tantrum or if something hurt him. I would have someone check for any welts on his body too if it isn't too late, or stickers on his girth/saddlepad. He really doesn't sound like the kind of animal to just spazz out for no reason.

Also, as far as learning to trust him again- ground work. Establish a good working relationship with him. Once you are ready to ride again, have your trainer put him through his paces before you get on, and perhaps even have a few lunge line lessons on him to loosen you up and and help you regain your confidence. Now that you know that there is the possiblity of tantrums, you can feel more prepared and ride him not anticipating problems, but definately with authority.

I'm so sorry that you got hurt and I'm sending well wishes your way!

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post #29 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 02:51 PM
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@Corgi- not going to tell you what I think you should do, that's waaaay above my paygrade, but I will tell you what I HAVE done as a woman older than you who's been busted up a plenty and some of it in the last 3 or so years just like you.

Here are some things I know from experience:
1) There is no DEAD BROKE horse that's still breathing

2) Bomb proof is only for Kevlar vests

3) MOST horses will not hurt you deliberately

4) 97% of injuries are caused by something the human did, because a horse is a horse and can be expected to act like one

5) If you handle horses (note I didn't even say ride, just handle) you are going to get hurt, the degree will vary

6) Whatever you decide with this horse is right. Either you will trust him again or not, but either way, it's how YOU feel that matters and your decision will be the right one for you. At the end of the day, you have to live with him, pay for him on an ongoing basis, so whatever anyone else thinks doesn't matter one bit.

7) A lot of the time, when we get tossed it's because we've quit riding. By that I mean, we're so relaxed and kind of inattentive and we become passengers on our horses which leaves them in charge and in decision making mode. Having seen how they make decisions and get injured seriously because they don't reason well, that's not a good place to be. We need to concentrate on riding actively the entire time we're up on a horse. (Not saying this applies in your situation, but just saying it's a definite tendency for us, especially at the end of a 25 mile trail ride or something.)

I'm going to guess that because you're already pretty bonded to him, that you'll give it a try. So, here's my recommendation if you do. Have your trainer take over riding him and training him for sometime, 60-90 days to make sure that his tantrum doesn't happen again, and once you're healed sufficiently, you take lessons on a school horse that is enough to make you think and work but not enough to finish off whatever confidence you have left. Do this with as many other horses as you need to, to develop the kind of seat that will stick if he should forget himself again and throw another tantrum. Once you've built your confidence and your seat back to the sticking point, get back on him and ride him for all you're worth.

I suspect he was being pissy over the food at the fenceline and once he remembers that undersaddle and in a bit, we are not allowed to eat, he'll be over the pissy fit. Might take a couple of rides though, so hence the trainer suggestion.

I have recently had shoulder surgery because of a horse injury, and also had a crushed foot that turned into compartment syndrome and several surgeries because of that. I have been around horses all my life and can tell you the exact moment and exact thing I did that got me injured. Doesn't matter, I got hurt and that sticks with you.

Compartment syndrome is the ONE thing I've found that hurts worse than broken or cracked ribs. Try to get up and move around as much as you can, if you stay in bed too long pneumonia is a very real consequence of rib injuries. So is pleurisy and that hurts like HADES with a blower on it. Practice deep breathing and coughing as soon as you can to keep things moving around in your lungs, that will help avoid pneumonia. Yep, I've been there done that, only I came off a motorcyle and landed on a brick wall with my ribs. Not fun. I decided horses were safer.

Hoping you start to feel better soon, but I know you're hurting today! Cyber hugs (very very gentle ones)!
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Last edited by Dreamcatcher Arabians; 01-01-2012 at 02:57 PM.
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post #30 of 80 Old 01-01-2012, 03:50 PM
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I totally agree with Dreamcatcher.... Will add that if your confidence is blown, you shouldn't expect to magically overcome it. It will take time, and Dreamcatcher's advice to ride a few horses to get a better seat is excellent advice. If that's not possible, you might work with your trainer to ride in a controlled area (arena, round pen) and have the trainer try to get your schooling horse to move abruptly with you - maybe shaking a flag to startle the horse. At first she could warn you it's coming, and later she could do it without you 'knowing' it's coming. There will come a time that you realize you can ride through that without a full blown heart attack and you'll realize that you're better than you used to be....and your confidence will grow.

Good luck, I've been there and it's heartbreaking. Hope you're feeling better soon!
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