I'm such a baby
 
 

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I'm such a baby

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        03-14-2009, 07:55 AM
      #1
    Yearling
    I'm such a baby

    Ok, I made a confidence post here not long ago. I listened to everyone's replies and used them and I was gaining quite a bit of confidence back but today it was raining and so we decided to ride bareback in the lunging arena. My group(6 beginners) took three horses and ponies out(sonnett, melody and shorty) and were going to be lunged by my riding instructor bareback. I got put on melody(a pony) and I began freaking out because I was riding bareback and I felt I had no control and I felt as though it was the same horse I rode a few months ago who kept bolting with me for a whole hour. I freaked out and melody could feel how tense I was so she get walking into the middle where the riding instructor was and trying to get her to help me relax(what a great pony). The riding instructor stopped Melody and I burst into tears. I am still bursting into tears everytime I think about it. She tried to get me relaxed which happened in the end when she walked next to me and lead melody.
    After the lesson my riding instructor told me we will work on my confidence. Then my mum picked me up and coz my face was red and puffy from crying(i am such a baby) she asked "Did you fall off?" I told her what happened and now she is telling me that I am not cut out for horses and should quit. I really don't want to quit because horse riding is my dream come true, so what should I do. To make it worse everyone in my group was watching me and I was the only one who cried. Even the girl who is around 8 didn't cry. (not that I care what others think of me) but everyone kept asking what happened?
    What should I do?
         
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        03-14-2009, 08:18 AM
      #2
    Showing
    No offense, but how dare your mother tell you that you should quit. If you love it, don't ever quit. Maybe you just need to work a little slower. Since you are having some confidence issues, I am not sure that going bareback is the best thing for you right now. For the time being (until you feel like you are ready) I would stick with a saddle and a good responsive horse. Melody sounds like a sweetie. In time, you will get more comfortable and maybe then you will feel confident enough to go bareback. Whatever you do, you can't let one setback drive you away from something that you love. Just stick with it and you will be able to work through the fear, just remember to breath (in through your nose and out through your mouth) and RELAX. Riding is supposed to be fun. You'll get there, just don't give up. And as for the 8 year old, "Oh, the arrogance of youth" remember the time when you thought you were invincible? She is there and someday she will have that Oh crap!! Moment. Just wait.
         
        03-14-2009, 09:45 AM
      #3
    Green Broke
    Don't give up!!! I STILL have moments like these sometimes - I went over a TINY little jump the other day and got knocked off balance and I had a group of people watching me, it was nerve racking!! I almost burst into tears myself and I'm 29 yrs old! So don't feel bad, it happens to all of us...but if you really love horses and riding, don't stop! You'll only get better at it, just stick to it. But as long as your confidence is down, I wouldn't ride bareback anymore, you need the security of a saddle and stirrups right now. It sounds like you have a GREAT pony to ride, maybe ask if you could have a private lesson every now and then so you don't get nervous and feel like you have an audience watching you?

    Don't worry, keep going, you'll get over this!!
         
        03-14-2009, 09:54 AM
      #4
    Weanling
    Tayz, I Commend you for keeping on even though it is nerve wracking. Overcoming fear is not an easy thing. Talk to your instructor, and see if perhaps you can take private lessons. Take it slow, and at your own pace. You are riding for you, you don't need to let anyone else dictate at what speed you should be comfortable. Like other people said, this is supposed to be fun! Everyone has bad days and loses confidence, but don't let that be the overwhelming feeling you have when you ride.
         
        03-14-2009, 10:05 AM
      #5
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by smrobs    
    Maybe you just need to work a little slower. Since you are having some confidence issues, I am not sure that going bareback is the best thing for you right now. For the time being (until you feel like you are ready) I would stick with a saddle and a good responsive horse. Melody sounds like a sweetie. In time, you will get more comfortable and maybe then you will feel confident enough to go bareback. Whatever you do, you can't let one setback drive you away from something that you love. Just stick with it and you will be able to work through the fear, just remember to breath (in through your nose and out through your mouth) and RELAX. Riding is supposed to be fun. You'll get there, just don't give up.
    Yes...just like training a young horse, comfort and confidence comes faster for some than others, and there is nothing wrong with taking it slow, one step at a time! People and horse both have bad days, and our own minds are sometimes our worst enemies...relax, enjoy, and try not to 'think' too much.
         
        03-14-2009, 07:01 PM
      #6
    Yearling
    Thanks. There were lots of reasons I freaked out. I'll try putting them in dot points.
    -I have never ridden Melody and had been told she could be stubborn.
    -Melody wasn't looking very well when she was trotting around the ring with a kid younger than me on her back(coughing)
    -The bolting horse I rode and lost my confidednce to last year was around the same size as melody.
    -I was only just getting comfortable with the saddle... I really didn't want to be holding onto a neck strap and trying stay on to the pony so quickly.
    -It had rained several minutes ago and the horses weren't to happy that they had gotten rain in their faces.
    -I really didn't want to ride a small pony(bareback), especially one who looks really sick.
    -I think I would have been ok on Sonnett(around 14-15hh)(one of the horses I got really close to)
    - I also got really nervous because they were all watching me..

    If you don't know, I lost my confidence last year( in december) when I went on a holiday and went horse trekking. The man put me on a 2 yr old pony called Lofty(Way too young to be a beginner riders horse) I was very confident back then but then when we started to ride Lofty bolted with me. At first I thought that I had kicked him into a gallop but he bolted with me for the whole hour trekk. I gave up with trying to stop him and just held onto the pommel of the saddle and tried to not fall....It was not a fun day. I hope to never ride a 2 year old ever again.(2 year olds shouldn't be beginners horses anyway)...
         
        03-14-2009, 07:49 PM
      #7
    Green Broke
    Well, in the first place, I didn't ride bareback until I had been riding for severel years, but now I just hop on and canter everywhere. Ask if you can ride a horse, not a pony because sometimes ponies are ALOT bouncer and harder to stay on whilst trotting! Don't be scared, and NEVER be scared to say, I don't feel confident doing that right now. That is the one thing that I love about my trainer she is really hard on us, but wont push us farther until she knows we are confident with what we are doing. Never give up!
         
        03-17-2009, 06:20 AM
      #8
    Yearling
    Thanks.
    This weekend, as soon as I get to the riding club I am going to be very confident and ready. I am going to relax, breath, remind myself that the horse can't go anywhere I don't want it to go and to have fun!
    :) I really want to get over the bolting horse so I am going to try and forget it and start from day 1 of my riding lessons.
         
        03-17-2009, 06:06 PM
      #9
    Super Moderator
    Don't feel bad about being scared about a horse bolting with you. I've been riding for 9ish years and I still get really freaked out if I feel like the horse is going to take off. Have you tried reading the Centered riding books? They're really helped me feel more comfortable by kinda giving me a mental checklist to go through when I start feeling scared. I think to myself am I still breathing? (because when you stop breathing you get really stiff and then that messes up your balance so you feel like you're going to fall off)
    Are my heels still down? (another balance thing)
    Am I focusing on where I'm going instead of staring at the horse? (balance)
    And so on. Usually by that point I've realized that I'm fine and then I stop feeling freaked out. =D
    Another thing I tell myself is that the horse really doesn't want me to come off so it's going to go out of it's way to stop me falling off. That may or may not be true but I like thinking it. And most of the horses that I've fallen off of act like it's a major ego blow that I fell off.
    Good luck! I've been there, I understand! Don't let your mom's comments get you down, use them to give yourself confidence! Tell yourself you're going to show her that you can do it and not give up!
         
        03-17-2009, 08:00 PM
      #10
    Banned
    Quote:
    Well, in the first place, I didn't ride bareback until I had been riding for severel years, but now I just hop on and canter everywhere. Ask if you can ride a horse, not a pony because sometimes ponies are ALOT bouncer and harder to stay on whilst trotting! Don't be scared, and NEVER be scared to say, I don't feel confident doing that right now. That is the one thing that I love about my trainer she is really hard on us, but wont push us farther until she knows we are confident with what we are doing. Never give up!
    I was the same I didn't ride bareback until I'd been riding for ages just try and keep calm don't worry I fell of my sisters welsh this morning bareback because he trotted down a hill doing happy kicks you are not the only one so don't worry and DON"T QUIT if ridings what you what to do then get out there and have laugh when you fall of when my mare bucks me off I just in front on her and burst into giggles (cause she does it all the time)
    Ireland
    Have faith heres the horse that bucked me off this morning go on laugh here he is with my sister
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