Our daughters pony is iron sided, kinda, she actually stubborn.
While this may or may not pertain to your situation, I'll tell the story anyways.
We bought said pony, ground manners SUCKED, but she ride all day. A few weeks of our daughter teaching ground manners, they were way better.
Manners=check, calm ride= check, control at speed=kinda.
Many many hours of riding, by both my daughter and I got her right, spurs, crops, and what we recently found that helped the most was proper feeding.
We took quite a few pounds off the ole gal and she's almost another pony. She's more responsive, more active, and more willing.
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